"Her"

At last

"So things have finally started getting serious. Now I feel like I'm living instead of playing at it."

Love often has that effect. She regards the woman with a slight smile. Is she everything you wanted?

"No. But that's part of growing up. You find out what you need is more important than what you want. She isn't perfect, but I prefer her with imperfections. I feel like I'm dealing a flesh and blood woman. Not some impossible wet dream or a goddess. I'm learning the difference between naive fantasy and real life by being with her." She pauses, letting her food settle into her stomach. "I thought things were going to be different. I thought I was going to fall in love when I was in my thirties with a few more degrees on my wall, and a published book on my shelf."

IShe smiled at the woman, not unkindly.Oh? Sounds like naive idealism. How many chances at love have you missed out on by thinking you had to make seventy-five thousand dollards a year? By believing your hair, your vehicle and your dialect had to be perfect?

The woman smiles bravely with tears in her eyes. "More times than I care to remember."

What's different now? Why are treating this relationship differently than all the others?

"For once, I feel comfortable in my own skin. I'm not overreaching myself to communicate with her, and I'm not shrinking myself down to her level either. She doesn't view me as a project to fix, or a dog to leash. She doesn't even treat me like a sugar mama. She can hold her own, and I respect her for that. She doesn't panic me in any way. I don't feel nervous, and I don't feel like I'm trapped in a relationship I don't want to be in."

Tread carefully. You don't know her well enough to decide if you should be with her forever.

" As tempting as it is to give her everything, I'm well aware of the fact that I have yet to get a good look at her dark side. A relationship can only last as long as you can tolerate a person's faults I imagine. It remains to be seen if I can tolerate hers.