Who Do I Think I Am??

This one's about the mightiest mountain of all.

THE PROMPT: "Tell us about your mountain experiences. Holidays? Dreams? Plans?"

Good evening everyone! Well, it was bound to happen (although I'm surprised I made it this long)...finally, I've run up against a prompt that I don't particularily care for. No big deal though. Being the "complaining male" that I am, it seems like some of my best entries come from the worst prompts. But this one isn't as bad as some I've seen in recent months. It's just that it really has nothing to do with me and I don't have much to offer it.

So here's where I deviate from the masses with this entry. I'm not much of a hiker anymore. Hell, I don't even live near any kind of mountains to my knowledge. Let me finish running down the list...Holidays? Those presidents on Mt. Rushmore give the kids an entire week off of school...when I went to school we had off for Lincoln's and Washington's birthday, until they consolidated them into one catch-all "Presidents Day", and now kids get a whole freakin' week off? Children these days are spoiled. Dreams? I seldom remember them, so that's out...and even if I did remember them, they're never about mountains. And plans? Plans? My backyard isn't very big, so I have no plans on building a mountain anytime soon. Even more unlikely are plans on vacationing on a mountain, climbing a mountain, unclimbing a mountain, and mounting anything more than my ass on my computer chair.

So no, I don't do mountains. Unless...

MOUNTAIN DEW!!

Ahhh, pure, sweet, yellow-green liquidy carbonated confection, how much do I love thee? Those of you who read my previous attempts at this internet web-logging craze, "I'm Studying You" , will be very familiar with my love of the stuff. That was my drug of choice...part of my excuse for taking a gander at justjessica1. I could pass by no less than six closer places in a short walk just to have her cash me out for one.

Say what you will, haters. Say you don't like its citrusy wonderfulness. Tell me it looks like pee pee. Complain that it's too sugary. I don't want to hear it. And you Mountain Dew Code Red fans can stuff a sock in it too, cuz that stuff's plain nasty. And while I will love the orange-flavored Livewire always, it's too hard to find (unless you know people in the industry ). Mountain Dew Amp? It's not the same anymore since they got away from the tiny cans that you could just throw down like it was a shot of Crown Royal. The "Big Rig" concept of Amp was nice, but two of those in a day was enough to induce tremors, heart palpitations, and slight hallucinations. And if anyone mentions "diet" and any kind of soda in the same sentence, I might just puke.

So that said, there is but one original. The beverage I once referred to as Saint Dew. That, kind readers, is the extent of my experience with mountains.

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MUSICAL BREAK!!

Not sure if there's any odes out there to the great Mt. Dew. These might be the best I can do tonight...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Vvs1N1wVeU

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7v2GDbEmjGE&ob=av2e

VITAL STATS:

Not once, but twice today, did my boss call me into the office, only to say inappropriate things that only her and I would find funny. Well, I'm sure other people would find them funny too, but most of you would say we're either very childish, disgusting, or both. And you'd probably be right.

How is it that the Sabres can skate with the top teams in the league, and beat them, but struggle against teams just as good or below them in the standings? How does that work"

Alrightey...it's salami sandwich time over here cuz I'm starving and the lady of the house has her ladyfriend over, waking her up in the middle of her nap, which means all thoughts of dinner are nil. And I'm ok with that. You all go on and enjoy your night and stuff...thanks for your time! Peace, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dIgey9NLdhk