CHARLIE HEART

CHAPTER FOURTEEN: BRUCE, THAT WAS GINGER

BRUCE, THAT WAS GINGER

         “Um, thats, really nice of you Miss Perkins but right now I just...”
         “Oh, but I just made some more snacks for you.” She leans forward and whispers. “Trust me, this one is worth it, Charlie.” She points with her eyebrows at Dippenhammer. Then she makes a sad old lady face that only Hitler could turn down.
         Maybe it’s pity, maybe I’m completely out of my mind, but I give in. I hand the gun to Tommy who hides it in his pants and I open the door.
         Dippenhammer looks like she wants to run but Sheila looks like a baby on a playground. She waddles in and sits down on my voice automated chair. When we all sit down I nudge Bruce awake with a hard elbow thrust. The first person he sees is Dippenhammer and he starts freaking out and feeling around for his gun, shouting for Cindy.
         Eventually he calms down and asks me if he is dreaming. I tell him yes, yes Bruce you are dreaming.
         “This is a pretty gay dream, Charlie.”
         “Very gay, Bruce.”
         Tommy makes a sound like a jungle cat then says, “Man, you fine girl,” and winks at Dippenhammer as she sits. Now I really have to throw up.
         “Anyways,” says Sheila “Like I was saying, Jodie here has been a friend of mine for a very long time and has been studying the art of psychology.”
         Bruce growls.
         “She also has learned a technique that has really helped me out, It is called ultimate realization. It can really help you with your family problems, Charlie. I know it’s hard but we can help.”
         I start to hate Sheila and I have a funny feeling I know whats coming next. Sheila looks at Dippenhammer, who looks down at her shoes.
         Tommy speaks for me. “Alright.”
         “Well, it’s kind of a new age form of meditation; accepting your life and seeing it more clearly,” says Dippenhammer, or Jodie, or Skeletor, or whatever.
         More like hypnotism, I think to myself.
         Tommy and Bruce both look at me. I’m glad I gave Tommy the gun or else I might be using it on her right now.
         “Well, lets do this pretty lady,” says Tommy.
         No, I take that back, I’d be using the gun on him right now.
         “Okay, um,” she clears her throat. “You just want me to jump right in and...”
         “You jump baby, you jump,” says Tommy.
         “Okay, you all might have to use your imaginations a little bit here.”
         “Oh, sweetie I got us an imagination, let me tell yah.” He winks at me.
         If Sheila weren’t there, my hands would be around Tommy’s neck.
         “Okay, okay, everyone close their eyes then,” says Dippenhammer.
         Everyone closed them except for me.
         “Now everyone take a deep breathe.”
         Everyone takes one but me.
         “You all now realize that the floor is completely gone, that you and all of the furniture are floating.”
         Bruce’s feet shuffle.
         “You know can feel the wind blowing up from underneath us, encircling us and keeping us afloat. You can can feel the wind entering into your lungs and transforming into helium, making you lighter than sunshine.”
 Sheila wrenches out a deep smokers cough. I want to clean my house suddenly.
         “Now, you are the air. You are the sunshine. You realize that your body is a working factory of little balloons that are pressing against the inside of your skin wanting to burst out into the world.”
         Where does she get all this? Dose she just make it up as she goes?
         “Your hands are growing larger and lar...”
         My phone buzzes, I look down, Ginger texted me.
         It says ‘Are you at your house?’
         I text back, ‘yes, why?’
         ‘Just wanted to know.’
         ‘okay...’
         She asks, ‘do you still have my record player?’
         I text her back, ‘yes, I do, why?’
         Dippenhammer’s voice stops. I look up.
         She says, “you know, this is a lot better with music. Do you have any music?”
         Everyone is looking at me.
         “Um, yah, sure.” I think really quickly. “Oh, I know.” I turn and face my kitchen. “Record player on,” I shout. Somewhere on one of my kitchen shelfs, Frank Sinatra starts singing.
         “I love Frank Sinatra,” Says Sheila.
         Dippenhammer continues. “Okay, anyways, You now realize you are on a safari...”
         For some reason Tommy is staring at me, staring like I have never seen him stare before. He looks at me the way you would look at a doctor that just diagnosed you with aids or something.
         I give him a confused look and say, “what?”
         He says, “A voice responsive record player?”
         “Ya, Ginger gave it to...”
         Then he is up on his feet and running to the kitchen, tripping over a chair as he runs, breaking it and splitting it in half.
         I say, “Tommy?”
         He throws open three or four cabinets before he finds the record player. He grabs it off the shelf and marches back over to us. He is running as fast as he can and is screaming for us to move.
         Move!
         Move, get out of the way.
         Move!
         My phone buzzes again. It reads, “I’ll miss you, Charlie. I really will.”
         Tommy hurdles the record player through one of my windows and glass sprays the atmosphere.
         Seconds later there is a loud shocking rumble that shakes the whole building. More of my windows break and Dippenhammer and Bruce both scream. Fire and smoke swirls up at us and the alarms in the place go off. I drop my phone and the touch screen shatters and goes dead. The lights go out and I feel Bruce struggling to get up off the floor using my leg.
         He shouts, “What was that?”
         When everything settles and I can hear the distant fire and police sirens in the distance I say, “Bruce, that was Ginger.”