A peek at the REAL Thumbster

____ Entry

Hi there Thumb fans...or should I say Thumb fan? It's been such a long time since I last posted I doubt I have any Thumb fans left...except for you. I take it you're still a fan? That's being really presumptuous of me though isn't it? Sorry. Well here's hoping if you do now hate me, you don't hate me with a passion. Maybe if I do a good job with this entry you won't want to disembowel me and we can be friends again? Sheeeeesh I hope so. I've grown quite attached to my bowels over the years...but even more importantly...I'd miss you.

Okay, so what prompted me to add a new entry today? (Besides wanting to keep my bowels and not anger you further) Well awhile back I happened to notice an item somebody had written as a Writing.com contest entry. I seem to recall the item was titled "Shark Attack". I'm not sure if "Shark Attack" was the title of the contest or that person's entry. From what I remember, the object of the contest was to write a short story in one hundred words without repeating any words. What an interesting challenge! Now there's a contest I would have liked to have entered. Back in 2004 I entered a "Describe a Woman" contest, (250 words or less without using she, her, etc), with an entry I called Deeply Loved, Dearly Missed. I consider that item the best thing I've written here. I doubt I can do better, especially with the stricter restrictions forbidding reusing words but I would have liked to have given it a try. Here then is the Shark Attack entry I would have written. (Remember I can't repeat any of the 100 words)

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Shark Attack


My legs are getting tired Gary.

Swim.

We can't make it. Let's turn back.

Keep going...oh shit!

Huh?

Look! There.

Where?

All around! SHARKS!!!!

Crap!

Scary fishies...eat Simon. He'll be much tastier. Go for him instead.

Gee thanks. Now see what you've done. Get away! Shoo!

They're leaving me alone.

Figures. Ouch! Stop biting! Aaaargh! Yikes! Owwwwww!

Please yell less loudly. Your screaming is very disturbing. I'm trying to daydream over here.

Eeeeee. Better?

Yes.

Eeeeeee.

No duplicates allowed remember.

That had six small "e"s. The other used five.

Oh.

How many left until a hundred words?

One.

Eeeeeeee.

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Okay hopefully that was 100 unrepeated words exactly...well technically it was 108 words if you count the title, and all the contractions as two words instead of one word. In that case then, count all the contractions as single words and if the title counts as part of the text then, drop "Aaaargh!" and "Owwwwww" for "Shark Attack", or better yet, don't drop them but drop "Shark Attack" instead. On second thought, that's all too confusing. I think I can do a better job if I have another go at making a different entry, but this time I'll simply title it "____ Entry", and the title won't count towards the 100 words so as not to cause any needless confusion. Also this time it won't have anything to do with Sharks. It will be 100 unrepeated, nonshark related words. Ready?...

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____ Entry


This first sentence should prove the easiest. Each word from now on is more difficult to avoid duplicating. Repeating something makes it ineligible and therefore cancells itself out. Imagine what life would be like if...racism...war...cruelty...could simply vanish so effortlessly? Poof. Gone forever, like they no longer existed. Conversely, other concepts such as...love...hope...kindness...might also get cast into oblivion unless one pays careful attention. Same deal with adorable, little forest critters or romantic sunsets. Most importantly of all, your name must never be mentioned twice, because I can't live in a world without...

you.

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Okay, that sucked too. It's not as easy you'd think, using precisely 100 words without repeating any. You should try it.

Bye for now.

Gary






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