ME!

Where To Begin?

To be honest I've gone through quite a bit for only being 20 years old. I guess we'll start at the beginning when my parents got a divorce.
I was coming home for school when I saw my dad in the shed sorting through things. At the time I really didn't think anything of it because he had mentioned before that it needed to be cleaned out and organized. So, instead of asking what was going on I went on into the house. Upon entering the back door I found my mom crying. First thing that came to my mind was to give her a hug. As we embraced she looked down at me and told me that my dad was leaving. I really didn't understand what she meant so I asked how long he was going to be gone. She told me that it was forever. That's when the realization hit. My parents were getting a divorce. I knew what divorce was because many of my friends' parents had been divorced.
I pushed myself away from my mom and ran outside to my dad asking him why. He told me that he had to leave and that it would be better once everything settled. I yelled at him and told him that it would never be better.
I ran back inside and straight to my room, slamming my door behind me. My mom tried to calm me down but I kept pushing her away. She finally left to go find my little brother whom had just walked in the door.
I lay on my bed crying. And I remember my grandma coming in to try to comfort me. All I could say to her was why. She didn't have an answer for me. About that time my dad came in to tell me goodbye. He hugged me and when he tried to leave I wouldn't let him go. He pried himself away and left abruptly.
After he had left the room and went and sat by my window. That's when I saw my dad driving away. I watched him drive all the way out of town and then some. I couldn't stop crying and begging for him to come back. I couldn't stop crying.
My little brother came in to find out what was wrong. I was forced to stop, I didn't want him to see me this way. He didn't understand what was going on and I didn't want him to find out. So I made the decision to give up my childhood and try to hide everything from my brother so that he may live a few more years in peace.
I was there for my mom too. She was just as torn inside as me, but for different reasons. She told me that she didn't want this to hurt me anymore and that I needed to get over it.
So, I did. But not really, I just hid everything from everyone very well.
And now you know the beginning of many problems to come. And I would like you all to know that I'm here to help in any way for any problem.