I'm Studying You

In my urban/suburban village...

I got hit on today.

Ladies, before you get anxious and start doing crazy things like sending me email roses (---<----@), let me assure you The Kid is still on the market. Why?

It was by the military.

I woke up and dillydallied around the 542 before I let the craving for eggs, sausage and mashed potatoes get the best of me. Got my bones together and made steps down to the diner...didn't even hit Walgreens first. Got my paper from the honor box and the Dew was all set. Headphones strapped, I'm straight to get what I want.

I love this area. It's residential but everything's close...a 15 minute walk to anywhere for anything. But damn...

If rule No. 1 is don't talk to me in public unless I engage you, rule No. pre-1 is if my headphones are on, that's your cue to move along and not bother me. My long-time regulars know that (and much respect for the 3500+ views that I woke up to this morning...you cats blow my mind).

So I'm crossing an insignificant side street when a fancy black car stops and does everything to get my attention while I'm trying to groove on "Gift Shop" by The Tragically Hip. And my annoyance factor has just hit the clouds.

"Hey! Ever thought about joining the service?" Whew...finally someone not looking for directions or cigarettes. But still, fuck that.

I gave a very curt "No" as I sized up all the pins on their pockets and figured out they were Navy recruiters. And that's a lie...I almost joined the Marines out of high school, and boy did dad rip my shit up when I told him I wasn't gonna follow in his footsteps and join to learn how to push a broom for the rest of my life. But I digress...

Navy boys in the black car ask my age. It looks like a drug transaction on my way to summer school. They didn't give a shit that I was older than them and looked younger than them...the cocky SOB in the driver seat made sure he got his two cents in also.

I'm not interested, but thanks. And I'll be sure to pass the business card along to anyone willing to get it out of my garbage can.

So I eat and realize I totally fucking blew it with Jess. My political fundraiser is tomorrow, so I offered her a ticket (one for$25, couples for $40, or go with me and it's free). She says if I'd asked 3 weeks ago she would've gone. Well, I didn't have tickets 3 weeks ago and something else always comes up in conversation. And yeah, I flatfuck blew this one too. What could be worse? Mr. Vice Chairman over here has sold all of one ticket...to himself. Maybe it's good that she's not going, as I've been informed I definitely will be working the grill. I can do hot dogs, but good luck if you take one of my burgers. I don't cook shredded cow well.

And this is my final rant for the day...I'll get all Radiohead and call it my final fit, my final bellyache...

So I'm jacked that my picture messaging kinda works. Got Hailey's and she got mine; Ash got mine but I didn't get hers. Then I'm foolin' around outside with my digital camera...got off a few shots and then it just dies. Nothin. That sucks. I hope maybe my stepmom has the reciept because it should be under warranty. But I'll hopefully have a new pic or 2 to post either tomorrow or Friday. I have no luck with cameras. Technology has again kicked my ass.

Anyway, I'm out. One of the annoyances from down the street asked me if I had a smoke and invited me to sit out front of my own place. Wow, that's balls. Who does this kid think he is?!? Dude, don't invite me to my front. My apartment. I make the rules down here son, and if I don't like you...hold up, dude just took off. Nice. Anyway, enjoy your evening everybody. Don't talk to strangers.