I'm Studying You

Everybody's got something to hide...

First, respect The Beatles...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YBOUZT_5ODc

My dining room table is like the command center of my house. When I'm not outside or asleep, I'm probably spending 97% of my domestic time there. It also pretty much happens to be the first thing you see upon entering my abode.

So because I spend so much time there, it naturally tends to amass piles of generally useless things (mail, newspapers, crossword puzzles, pens, pencils, lighters, notebooks, cigarettes, notes about things to write, phone numbers I won't call, rent reciepts, small African infants that I pay seventy-six cents a day to try and save because the old guy on tv guilted me into saving a small African infant or 6, books I keep telling myself I'm going to read someday, a broken iPod, a couple pairs of headphones, Jimmy Hoffa, a wicker basket, tissues and napkins, Mountain Dew bottle caps with the codes on them to contests I'll never enter or win, and more) that can occasionally overclutter and seriously damage the Feng-Shui that my life's already lacking.

So as the first step of the major house-cleaning project I'm doing in advanced hopes of strengthening my confidence in case a certain female decides out of the blue that she wants to stalk me, gets my address out of the Wallgreens do-it-yourself photo kiosk and shows up chillin' in one of the chairs in front of my house when I come home some night, I undertook the grand chore of moving the mess from one part of the house to the other cleaning off my dining room table. After all, a candlelight dinner just isn't the same when it's a Glade scented candle atop a stack of poetry books you still haven't read yet.

And ohhhh the things one might find! At least 2 more lighters, boxcutters, shopping lists of shit I forgot to buy, to-do lists never done, pictures I thought I lost, 2 clicky pens that I got pissed off at because they wrote like crap...until I realized they were mechanical pencils, and this little guy, which I got for fifty cents at the library used book and craft sale.

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He just looked so awesome sitting there, so I think that's his new home. And monkeys are awesome. The cool thing about this little guy? He doesn't fling poop, complain that the music's too loud or try to crawl all over me while I'm eating Cheetos and doing a crossword puzzle! If only the rest of my life was so easy!

The next task: gathering the clothes strewn about the house. Or maybe putting all my cds back where they belong. Or just chillychillin' with the neighbors and not gettin' beaten by the heat. Later y'all.