I'm Studying You

you can all say you told me so

Grab a kleenex or 6. The Kid got the verbal beatdown of the century about a half hour ago.

Yup. Y'all know who I'm talkin' 'bout.

Since I haven't been around as much lately, and I'm sure no one's really all that interested in my "date" with the mayor last night, I'll skip to the admonishing I got today.

It's been a lazy day. Woke up, futzed around and took a nap. Woke up and it was almost 5pm. Thought for certain if CWC was working today, I probably missed her. Hopped on my getaway sticks and went down to Walgreens anyway.

Wrong move, sucka.

She's doing something with the sunglasses rack. I pass, grab the one true passion in life that loves me back (God bless the saints that developed Mountain Dew) and strolled past a hard-working CWC.

me: You're doing a fine job!

her: Shut up...I'm mad at you!

me: What? Why you mad at me?

(I'm warning you all now...what you're about to read actually did come as a shock to me. And it ain't pretty.)

her: Because you're slow.

me: What? I'm slow? How am I slow??

her: I've been waiting 2 months for you to ask me out and now I'm seeing somebody.

me: Well, you could've said something too ya know.

her: Well...I'm old fashioned.

me: Well...you need to not be seeing other people!

She then kept going on about how beautiful the rose is, and how it keeps getting bigger, and it's on her kitchen counter, and...fuck, does this type of shit actually happen to people? I mean, ok. I'm not a bad looking dude, but I never I guess would have expected her to have said what she said. I really think she would've shot me down. Three times I said almost all the right things, three times left with non-comitting open-endedness.

Don't feel bad for me. I feel dumb and bad enough for all of us. But I've learned a lot in this whole situation. And this, my friends, is not over. It's not the end. Someone once told me a bit of wisdom that I'd like to share with you: Boyfriends aren't obsticles, they're stepping stones.