Amygdalia's Blog

My Grandpa

My Dad and stepmom wrote this for the Rabbi to read at Grandpa's funeral.  I've edited it very slightly.  It's funny, moving, and wonderful. 

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Harry P. was small in physical stature, but he was a commanding presence in the lives of all he touched, especially his family. 

He was born in Bransk, Poland in 1909 and emigrated to New York when he was 5.  While visiting Ellis Island a few years ago, he showed Sandy the exact spot in which he was standing when he saw his father for the first time. 

Harry was the youngest of six children of Elka and Jacob P.  He had four sisters, Gussie, Fannie, Sarah and Mary and one brother, Ben. Harry says that he was born on December 25th, but that he celebrated his birthday most of his life on the 15th. He said that his brother, Ben who was a year older than him, "stole" his birthday when he entered school.  In recent years he reclaimed the 25th, which meant we had 10 more days to get his card and present together. 

In 1935, Harry married the love of his life, Lillian F., with whom he will now lay beside forever.  She idolized him and it was reciprocated totally. He was a truly incredible and caring husband.  They had a wonderful family life together.  They enjoyed one another and enjoyed the clearly defined roles they had created with one another. 

As an immigrant, Harry took advantage of the best of what America had to offer.  Coming here at 5 and not speaking English, he followed his early education at Torah Vodath Yeshivah in Williamsburg by attending City College.  There he got a Bachelors Degree and later a Masters degree in Civil Engineering, at a time when graduating from high school was itself an accomplishment.  And he also found time to be on the wrestling team.

His education and his natural intelligence (yes, he did the New York Times Crossword puzzle daily) gave him access to important and satisfying work that took him all over the world.  He worked in Nicaragua, in Alaska, in the Azores, and in Australia, to name just a few.  In Australia, he lived with Lee for two years, establishing a whole new community and loads and loads of wonderful stories. To the end, he maintained contact with much of his Aussie family and we in fact got a message from one of them just a few days ago when we shared with his many friends his situation.  He told us to Be of Good Cheer, one of Harry's favorite sayings.

Through most of his career he worked for Tippetts, Abbett, McCarthy and Stratton, a major engineering and architecture firm in New York. On retiring from TAMS, he and Lee moved to West Palm Beach Florida where they lived wonderfully together until Lee got sick and they had to move back north.  While in Florida, he became an avid golfer, as did Lee, playing most days of the week. He also continued to work at some level while living there, getting his third Professional Engineering license, after New York and New Jersey.

The home that he and Lee created also produced two devoted children, Sandy and Stuart. The love of Judaism and of family that he and Lee transmitted to them has now been transmitted two generations further, to their three grandchildren Mark, Jodi and Amy and to their seven great-grandchildren Danny, Alex, Hailey, Shari, Sarah, Sophie and Jakie.

Just a month before Harry passed away, he and the family celebrated the Pesach holiday at the home of Jodi, Michael, Hailey and Shari. It was a marvelous holiday, which he, despite his rapidly failing health, enjoyed thoroughly. The food, the stories, the laughter, the giggling, these were traditions passed down from Harry and Lee, traditions that will continue to live on thanks to them.

Harry was a powerful man, very committed to his views. And he could be stubborn! Oh so stubborn. But as stubborn as he could be that was also how devoted he could be. First to his mother, Bubba, and then later to Lee. Harry's devotion to Lee while she was in the Nursing Home, sitting with her every day for hours on end, feeding her, devoted to her, these are images that all who knew them then will always remember.  And now he is with her again, no doubt catering to her as he always has.

Harry P. will be missed very very much, by all he touched, by his children, grandchildren and great grandchildren; by the many other close members of his family and of Lee's family; by his extended family and friends around the world. He was a unique presence and a unique man.

Harry: BE OF GOOD CHEER!

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