I'm Studying You

What else is new?

I'm pretty sure if shopping carts were involved, there would have been blood shed.

Yes, I'm talking Walgreens.

I'm making my way to the cooler. As I cross the center aisle, our heroine comes to the end of the aisle. Startles the shit out of both of us. Both of us come to a screeching halt. I think she had smoke coming from the bottom of her shoes.

Talk about an awkward pause. There was a good couple seconds before either of us realized what was going on. After I let her smile sink in and rub off a little chemistry on her, the dork in me takes over (something needs to be done about that guy). I got that sly smile goin' on out of the side of my mouth and deadpanned "That could have been fatal."

I don't know what's worse...that I actually said that, or that she actually got a good laugh out of it.

Grabbed my drink and a box of tissues and went to cash out.

Walgreens, I swear, is the Florida of the north for old ladies and their damn coupons and rainchecks and bullshit. Arguing the prices, complaining there's no Dove Chocolate that's supposed to be on sale, digging for their exact change, growing one minute closer to death and seriously fucking with my mojo. Congregating in front of the crowded register area so they can speak to whomever wants to come up and play "manager". Creating a scene when I'm supposed to be getting my love jones on. Forming a line behind me that stretches back to Penora St.

Am I the only one who goes to the store, gets what's on the list he forgot to take to the store with him anyway, and leaves the store in a timely fashion? Seriously.

I know CWC wants me to make a move. My ninja sense is telling me this (as are about 6-8 blog commenters a day). I will not let you down! And I will not be denied by the damn AARP convention that was dressed up like a pharmacy today.

But I also know better. Trust me...I'm not letting insecurity, shyness and overall acting like a pussy be a substitute for tact and charm. I'm not gonna put the poor girl on the spot and disrupt her while she's got a job to do, which I'm sure is more important than waiting for the schlubb who comes in everyday for his soda and paper to ask her out.

They have these crazy contraptions at their counters that when you pay by cash, it spits out the coin portion of your change. I don't understand this. And it's at the polar opposite end of the part of the counter where you pay. It doesn't make sense. But CWC was nice enough to reach around and grab my the four pennies along with my the $2 in singles she handed to me. She gives also gives me a look, kinda a smoky smile, and says (doesn't ask, says) "I'll talk to you soon." Yes, yes you will.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xFObRusJt24

Remember this song? I had the cassette single for this back in the day. Until I let a cousin borrow it, and that was the last I saw of it. Douchebag.

As I sat down to type this, listening to tunes, I feel a very awkward and extended nudge in my back...it's my half-brother Mike! He had to come to the library to print some stuff up and he couldn't do it at home. The little fucker got a car! A sick, pimped-out Chevy Cobalt that he's doing all this custom stuff to. Him and his (I'm not even gonna say a word about her cuz she's way too young for me) girlfriend. We talked for a few minutes; we'll get together soon. It was good to see him. Even if the only thing in the conversation that ever changes is the length of time since he last saw dad. And I can't really say anything lately either about that. I really should call him soon though.

Hope everyone's having a fantastic day. The sun is shining, there's money in my pocket and and a devilish look on my face...hopefully tomorrow I'll have a better story.