Aurora Annabelle Rivers

Chapter 7

Chapter 7

I didn't think about anything, not even who I was kissing; it was a sort of spur of the moment decision.
He held me in his arms, my head lying against his chest. I couldn't think about what Julian would say if he had somehow witnessed any of this. I'd die.
"It's getting late," I whispered into his shirt.
"I'll drive you home," he whispered back leading me to the car back in his driveway.
We sat in silence in the car, and all that could be heard was the humming of the engine, as he drove off.
A moment later we were in front of my house. I had forgotten when Trisha told me about her party, so apparently all the blasting music and bodies dancing in the windows gave me a hint.
I looked at Alex remembering, "My parents went out of town so Trisha's throwing a party, I forgot."
He weakly smiled, then asked if I wanted to stay at his place. "Just for the night, no monkey business," he reassured me. "Don't worry, I can tell that you're tired."
I gave up; knowing that I wouldn't be able to bear the noise and Alex drove off. Before I finished yawning we were in front of his house again and he helped me out of my seat.
He swiped me out of the car, as if I were a little kid, just as Julian had done previously. When we got to his room, I was already half asleep and when he lay me down onto the bed, I patted beside me showing that was his place.
"You're sure?" he asked.
"You said no monkey business right?" I answered groggily and once I felt his body next to mine, I finally fell asleep.

I lay there next to Alex awake, while his arms were wrapped around me. I was so scared to look where we were, even though I already knew. I didn't even want to think about what happened, so I tried to just forget but what good what that have done.
I wanted to get up from where I was, to get away from Alex, and tell him that I would never see him again, but I was scared that it might have been my fault. I tried to pry his arm from me, but unfortunately that woke him.
"Morning beautiful," he said kissing my head. I faked a smile to him.
I looked around and saw some clothes sprawled onto the floor, like a slob. "Alex, I should get going," I said sitting up, not realizing how late it was and that it was a school day.
"What? Why? It's so early, come back," he said pulling me back into his arms.
"Alex, it's..." I began looking for a nearby clock, "Holy crap, Alex, its 12:20."
"So what, now you can spend all day with me."
"Are you kidding me?" I asked in disbelief. How could he think that this could have meant there was something between us after that night?
"Well after last night I thought..."
"Well, you know what? What happened last night, I think it was a total mistake, Alex. I don't know why it happened and it definitely shouldn't have either..."
"Aurora, how could it have been a mistake?" he said sitting up, "You told me that..."
"I know what I told you Alex," I said cutting him off, "But, Alex what happened shouldn't have happened at all. And as a friend or whatever we're supposed to be..."
"Aurora, you kissed me last night. How can that mean nothing to you? You told me that you loved me and now you just want to leave? I don't get it."
"There's nothing to get, Alex. I wasn't thinking about what I said last night. That's it."
"And that's you're excuse?" he asked, with no answer ready to come to him.
He sighed, "Okay, at least since its twelve or whatever, I'll take you to get something to eat. Okay, friend?" he said emphasizing the last word.
Before I could open my mouth to object, he jumped in, "And, just like yesterday, no monkey business, I promise," he said batting those big blue eyes of his.
I sighed, "Fine, but I need to go home first to get ready."
"What's wrong with the clothes you're wearing?" he asked. I just looked at him in disbelief and got up to walk downstairs to his car.

Because I took way too long in the shower at my home, by the time we got outside it was two o'clock. He ended up taking me to that same café place where we were last night and sat down at the same table.
"So, can we talk?" he asked innocently after we ordered our brunchean coffee and croissants.
"What is there to talk about?" I asked him.
"Aurora, can we please stop doing this. It's getting so old. I mean after last night, I thought that we actually had something going on again; am I getting the wrong vibes from you, because I thought that last night meant something."
"Look Alex, what happened shouldn't have. And as a friend or whatever we are, can we just not say anything about this."
"So you take everything back? Even that kiss you gave me?" I nodded my head, "Even when you told me that you loved me?"
"Alex, I did mean that; when I told you that I loved you..." I paused trying to find the words. Before I could think of anything I saw Alex look up and get defensive.
I turned around only to see Julian, Amanda and Connor, and Alan.
'This seriously can't be happening to me,' I thought. 'Aren't Aries supposed to have the best luck? Well here I am, with the worst luck ever.'
As much as I concentrated on keeping my eyes glued to the floor, I could feel Julian staring at me while everybody else was glaring at me; all in disbelief. I couldn't even try to pick out the words that would explain why I was in the café with Alex alone, instead of being at school.
The only thing I could feel in the air was disappointment and hatred; mostly hatred, but I didn't know whether that was meant to be directed towards Alex or me.

"Do you want to tell me what's going on?" Julian was the first to speak. I still couldn't look at him but was forced to when he asked, "Aurora can you please look at me?" I looked up and his chocolate brown eyes were full of sadness. Just the sight of this person, my Julian, he made me want to cry.
I couldn't face it and seeing his face for a mere second, my eyes shot back down to the floor.
"Alex, I think it would be best for you if you left," Connor stepped in. Alex who was staring at me, while everybody's eyes, but Julian's, were on him, got up and left.
As soon as Alex had gone, Alan, Connor and Amanda left Julian with me. "So should I sit down and let you explain or do I have to ask again for you to tell me," his soft but pleading voice came again.
It hit me so hard, how patient he was being and that just made me feel even more hideous to look at. I sighed in shame, not even ready to confess anything.
"Can we not do this here?" I asked. But at that moment, two croissants and cups of coffee were brought to the table.
"Oh," I said remembering about the food. Before I could try to get out some money for the food, Julian swiped out a twenty dollar bill and paid for everything for me.
I concentrated on making my coffee perfect, with the sugar and creamer, not even having an appetite to touch the croissant. I brought it up to my mouth, not prepared for the blast of sweetness I was in for.
"Blegh..." I said spitting it back into the cup. I picked up a napkin wiping my mouth and catching an escaped tear that ran down my face. He sighed leaning back into the chair, eyes still on my face, "I'm guessing you're coffee isn't any better than how you're feeling." I continued to stare down at the cup of coffee in my hands.
"Can we not talk about it here?" I asked shamefacedly again. He got up but only began to start walking out until I did. He was a couple of steps behind me giving me space; as if I deserved it.
'Why had I messed everything up?' I thought. It was me and Alex. Then came Julian, who took Alex out of the picture. That equaled happiness, but of course when Alex cam back to 'talk' everything just grew even more complicated.
Everything became undone because of Alex. 'He was to blame for all of this,' I thought. But suddenly I realized that it wasn't his fault or anybody else's.
'I'm the one to blame.'

We were at the park in a couple of minutes, but made sure I didn't go anywhere near the swings; it would have reminded me too much of what happened and why I was back in the park at that moment.
"Do you want to tell me what's going on?" a voice came from behind me. I had forgotten that he was even there, with his quiet steps he had taken, but I still couldn't find anything to say.
"Aurora, you don't know how much it's killing me to even think that you've been sneaking around behind my back and with Alex."
"Julian, I haven't."
"Then please tell me what's going on because I don't know what else to think about anything right now, except that."
"Julian, it's not. There's nothing going on between us."
"So you're telling me that you didn't kiss him yesterday?"
Realizing that he must have been in the café by the time Alex asked me that question, I answered, "That's not fair, I told him that I took it back."
"But nonetheless you kissed him, didn't you? Why Aurora?"
"It didn't mean anything to me," I pleaded.
"So, you're telling me," he began clenching his teeth between every phrase, "that when Alex asked if you took it back how you felt, that you didn't tell him that you still loved him?"
"Julian, I told you how I felt about him, even before we started going out. I thought you understood that." He had no response and apparently he had nothing left to say to me; we stayed in silence for a good two minutes.
"Aurora, I gave you my heart," he began again, taking my hand in his. "That's all I can give to you and if that's not enough for you..." he said bringing my hand to his mouth and kissing it, "then I'm not enough for you."