Snow Melt

I find myself missing Oklahoma

Fidál (Grace), 19 Baha (Splendor), 165 B.E. – Tuesday, April 8, 2008 about 1:20 PM PDT

I find myself missing Oklahoma, but I don't think it's actually Oklahoma I miss. I think I miss the carefree days of my childhood. I miss not having to worry about an overdrawn bank account. I miss not having to worry about the price of gas. I miss not having to worry about where my next meal is coming from. I miss not having to worry about being not worried because I'm not worried.

I miss the storms of Oklahoma. The charcoal clouds promising the lightning of a thunderstorm. I miss going Easter Egg hunting around Easter. I miss almost everything in my childhood that I thought I wouldn't miss when I grew up and could make decisions for myself. I don't think it's actually Oklahoma I miss, I miss not having responsibility.

When I was a child I looked forward to the responsibility of being an adult. Now I want the carefree existence of not having any responsibility. When I was a child I thought I would be happy with the responsibility an adult has, I was sure wrong about that one. Of course, my opinion could change in the next few days or weeks. However, right now I miss the carefree existence of my childhood with my grandparents.