Snow Melt

Under the influence of being an asshole:

"Invalid Entry"  I laughed uproariously. I think I laughed because the word asshole and laughter just seem to go together. All though I could have laughed for another reason; I actually do not know why I laughed, but I laughed. All right now that I have written my first reaction let me get down to the entry and the truth.

As for telling the truth in my journal, I hope I do. I attempt to. Whether or not I succeed is a completely different story. The truth is I do not think many people want to face the truth about themselves much less put it in an online journal for millions of strangers to read. Of course, it is much easier to let strangers read the truth about oneself (I always wanted to use that word in a journal entry) then ones friends and family.

Why did I start an online journal? I do not remember. This lack of memory has nothing to do with a senior moment or anything else. I started my journal in 2005 or there about. Then 2007 came along and my world fell apart. I faced tests of faith. I encountered aspects of myself I did not like and did think existed. I am in recovery now.

I did not put a lot of what happened last year in my journal. Parts of my journal I used to grip and complain. I do not like me when I gripe and complain. I sound whiney. I do not like to sound whiney. The more I bitched the more I had to bitch about.

I have learned a lot about myself in the past year. What I learned will eventually come out in my journal entries. The reason is simple, I have found that I need truth helps the muse along.

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