Shadow Puppet Storyteller

Is Time Flying?

I have several papers to have complete by the beginning of the week. I admit to not doing heavy research, but I do feel it all has involved deep contemplation. The matter of having put so little of it to paper, however, is a sore point. I have this habit of getting caught up in day-to-day matters. There are "more important things" which often get pushed aside. Truly I lose all perspective on good prioritizing. I even allow my life to be stalled by my being bothered about simple things being left undone around the house. And, after a while, I am driven to (or obsessively) cleaning!

I'm not bothered much by the mannerly ways of being which would have me always presenting my family in their best clothes, putting a proper step forward in this area either. So, what's happening here? The challenge is to improve myself, right? Will I actually gain a better handle on my use of time -- yet is that the mechanism that is broken at all?

One paper is on my healing through spiritual principles. A second, shorter, thought paper is on What it means to be One. The last is my most recent experience presenting a situation to an already licensed practitioner. This last one just needs to be taken from note form - I already have my thoughts on that one hashed out.

I have a process to work through, so, before I go to bed, I think that I will write this out as a process. I want to capture the essence of my situation in briefly describing it.

1) I have once again put myself up against a wall - procrastination and perfectionism are the boulders that so often block my path to easy success.

I say, "easy," because without these blocks, it is truly a matter of writing; that's it.

I feel rushed rather than informed. This makes me feel like a slacker, not a methodical student dedicated to learning and growing in Faith, nor likely to come off as informative.

2) I hope that I can depend on spiritual inspiration -- perhaps this is part of the procrastination making it a habit which is addictive. So, knowing this, my hope instead, should be that I can count on my enthusiasm to get me started earlier on programs and projects.

3) Enthused, it's a strange word, but I think it is the word I need to take to heart

4)My fear-based image of the worst outcome on these projects is failure through in-action. What if it can't be completed? What if it's all made-up lies? Anger at myself is the beast behind this fear.

5) "Giving up" is the negative belief I may have held, and to too great a degree, perhaps releasing to or magically trusting to a Higher Power to "DO" work I have not "DONE" and expect it to easily come out of my mouth/or through my hands without struggle

6) I'm telling the world from my little blog pulpit, so that I can accept responsibility for my work and know that what I do ultimately create DOES have the essence of God that I trust so fully in. It just needs a slight perception correction to make it flow well.