Catching Idle Butterflies

Inadequately Effective

I need to stop reading comments to my blog at work. It simply doesn’t do to blubber all over myself when my boss, another employee, or client can walk in at any moment.

I got lucky yesterday. No one visited me as I wiped away the surprise tears from reading the comment Budroe left in my 3/25 entry: "Write me a prayer, or is it pray me a writer?" .

Still, I had to log off the site and walk away from my computer for a bit, it left me so emotionally - startled is the best way I can describe it. Heck, here I am copying it into my word processor hours later, and I’m weeping all over again.

In case you haven’t read the entry, the short of it was how I need to exercise my prayer life. I don’t yet pray as well as I should.

This is how Budroe responded:

Prayer is one thing. Effective prayer is quite another thing. There are many differences between the two. One of the landmarks of effective prayer is that it accurately reflects relationship. When your prayer "descends" to the level of talkin' with Dad like you were walking on a trail, that's a pretty powerful relationship, and one that He does so enjoy. He knows the passions, and the desires of your heart. You can't really surprise Him by telling Him what He already knows. But, that you would share your doubts and fears, or your anger and frustrations with Him not only honors Him, but the relationship! I believe that doubt is one of the major components of faith. We all have a healthy dose of it in our lives, but do we share it with others, or with Dad?

It seems to me that your prayer life is in much better condition than you may suspect. I know that I covet your prayers, because it always seems that Dad listens when you talk with Him. Now, just how cool is that?

The last paragraph is what got me. Most of the prayers I’ve seen answered have had more than just me praying for them, so I never once considered my words had any effect. Okay, maybe a little, because I know God listens to everything I say, no matter how poorly I think I say it.

As most of you know, I tend to compare myself to others. I see how other people pray, and the time and effort they put into it. My efforts - by comparison - are like standing on the edge of a pool, placing my toe in the water, and call that swimming.

Therefore, with other people praying “better” than me, their efforts are rewarded with the hoped for results. Mine came in by association only, just like every member of a winning team gets the prize, even the ones who sat on the bench.

I blubbered because Budroe saw what I didn’t, and needed to. God indeed listens to me. I need not change the way I pray, because I already give God everything I am. So I talk to him as I would a friend, using small words in my car, the bathroom, at work, or walking that trail. God is ever eager for me to talk to him at any and all times. Our relationship continues to grow more intimate because I am just as eager, not how well or poorly I present myself to him.

I don’t need to sweat blood in order for God to hear me.

Two scriptures came to mind as I wrote this:

“And the Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. For example, we don’t know what God wants us to pray for. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groanings that cannot be expressed in words.” ~ Romans 8:26 (NLT)

“Pray without ceasing.” ~ 1 Thessalonians 5:17 (KJV)

ADDENDUM: I wrote this last night and afterward discovered I have much more to add. It will have to wait until later, though, if at all, because the proper words elude me. Some things, especially where God is concerned, no words can pin down.