The Snowflake Chronicles

How to Prepare Your Feet for Dinner

2 ‘Ala 163 B.E. – Saturday, Mach 3, 2007

Most people don’t go to a lot of trouble in preparing to eat their feet. They simply open their mouths and insert one or both of their feet. It’s not even necessary to be double jointed to do this. It’s basic to the nature of the beast. Humans are adept at consuming their feet, usually by accident without any prior preparation or thought. That’s the problem, if we knew before hand we were going to put a our own feet in our mouths, we would prepare them properly and add the appropriate spices or sauces.

The first thing we would do would be to wash them. Let’s face it not only do unwashed feet smell bad, but the probably taste bad as well. I’m mean have you ever tasted anything that smelled bad, it usually taste bad also.

Next one must choose the appropriate spices. Mint is always a good choice, since it both smells and tastes good. You don’t want to choose anything hot and spicy with feet. Getting the feet hot before inserting them in your mouth makes them smell and when feet smell, of course they taste bad. So mint leaves make an appropriate spice for feet because it smell good, taste good and is cooling.

Now the sauce, with mint either peanut butter or chocolate is a good choice. Both taste and smell good, they are cooling and they can be mixed with mint leaves quite easily. Of course, if a person is allergic to peanuts then choose the chocolate sauce. If you are allergic to chocolate, then a butterscotch sauce works just as well (I suppose).

So the best thing to do, before putting one’s feet in one’s mouth is the (1) wash them, (2) wrap them in mint leaves, and (3) cover them with chocolate sauce. Every day somewhere in the world, at least one human attempts to eat his or her feet by accident. Let put a stop to accidents like this a plan ahead. After all, since it’s human nature to open our mouths and insert our feet, we may as well find a way to enjoy it and make sure our feet taste good.