Opus

continuation of entry #1

Here are my stats:

Career

I have a high-profile lucrative career, which I abhor.  It was never my aspiration to be a ‘suit’, to be a cog in the machine of Corporate America, it just sort of happened that way. My job is like the panty hose and high heels I have to wear—confining and uncomfortable.  Everyday I go in and have to don a ‘professional’ demeanor, engage in pointless small-talk and reign in any part of me that is individualistic in order to conform to the ‘social norm’.  Advancement is not based on merit; it’s based on puckering up to the right people.  It’s ruled by ego.  I know how to play the game, and I play it well.  I am respected and well-liked by those in positions of power, and I’ve been told I have my future made, that I can ride it all the way to the top. 

But that’s not what I want.  I refuse to be pacified into believing I’m successful….it means nothing to me if I’m achieving someone else’s dream.  Just because I’m good at it and have the way paved does not mean I should do it.  In fact, I know I should not.  It would be a great disservice to myself if I just popped my head back in the box and barreled forward without questioning if I’m happy and fulfilled.