Breathing Room

Some Much Needed Perspective

Dear Phylicia,

Romantic involvement distracts you and can blind you to what's really in front of you. And what is really in front of you? You are. You don't even know yourself et. You think you know and you want to assert that you do, now that you're a certain age, but you don't. What's in front of you is a whole world of experiences beyond your imagination. Put yourself, and your growth and development, first.

There are long-term repercussions to what you're doing now. Everything you do, every thought you have, every word you say creates a memory that you will hold in your body. It's imprinted on you and affects you in subtle ways - ways you are not always aware of.

With that in mind, be very conscious and selective.

With high hopes for you,
Phylicia

This letter is from a piece done in O Magazine called Letters to My Younger Self. This letter is written by Phylicia Rashad and it really hit me. Hard. I know that I get so caught up in such menial stuff sometimes - including my relationship, and really its not THAT serious. I know that if I focused as much attention as I focus on me and Dave, on my career and writing and so many other things - my life would be that much more fulfilling.

I tacked this letter next to my desk. I'm having a new outlook on life and if that doesn't include Dave then so be it. I think too many women -myself included, obviously - let relationships get in the way of their lives and later look back and have regrets. Even Phylicia, who is very successful realizes this. Because despite success, "... there are long-term repercussions to what you're doing now" Because though you can still acheive so much, its easy to hold yourself back for other people.

I've thought about my "older" self and how I would look back at my "younger" self and what I would say. I don't know, but I know at this point I don't think I'd be too happy with myself. I take her letter as some much needed advice and from this point on I have a renewed outlook on the direction I want to take in my life.