Catching Idle Butterflies

Shall cooler heads prevail

Emotions are powerful things, necessary things. We love and act accordingly. We weep when we are sad, because holding it in can do more damage than not. When we are happy, we smile and laugh. We get angry, which is also part of who we are, we can lash out at the offender, sometimes justified, sometimes not, but anger is something we feel and can’t help it. Nor should we try to suppress it. Doing so only ends up causing damage because at some point it must be released.

It’s not what we feel that matters, it’s how we act upon those feelings.

This is where our more logical, rational sense needs to come in to play. Someone says something that makes us angry, and write out accordingly.

Is this always a bad thing? No. But we also must be careful, because then the person we got mad at can in turn get angry. Then we have a real war on our hands.

I caused one in an entry I wrote about atheists lashing out at Christians. Mavis Moog was deeply offended, but was kind enough to let me know privately. Instead of attacking in anger, she rationally relayed her own feelings. The end result was a saved friendship, and an agreement that any problems I have with something she says will be done between us, and no one else. I made that particular entry private out of respect for her as well as for others who haven’t read it yet.

I missed most of what recently took place causing pensive to make their entire portfolio private. Michael Wonch ’s discussed this in entry "Invalid Entry" .

Michael Wonch and I don’t agree on everything, but I have the greatest respect for him. He says exactly what’s on his mind. He’s also an example of letting emotions get ahead of the more rational side, but at the same time, when called on an error, he publicly apologizes.

For the part about pensive I agree with him. I don’t know who said what, and it really doesn’t matter. The result is one of my favorite writers has gone into hiding, perhaps for good. That is a terrible thing, and it breaks my heart. Note: I would say the same of any writer whether I like or dislike what they have to say. WdC is about free expression, and Michael Wonch makes a great point in that if we don’t like what someone writes, we have every right to never return.

Some may get defensive and say they weren’t the ones who made pensive disappear, that their comments weren’t meant to offend. Perhaps, and if you did offend, pensive should have emailed you back asking for clarification, just as Mavis Moog did for me.

My main point is, what someone infers from our words is sometimes more important than what we intend. Get angry, fine, but please, take a step back, let logic and empathy for the other person who offended you speak to you before responding.

As for the clique thing, however, I must disagree with a few points. Yes, to new bloggers, Blogville can appear cliquish. But to prove that incorrect, I will tell my own story.

I started my blog in November, receiving maybe one or two comments in each entry. Many times none. My views were pathetic.

Then I began reading and commenting on others. I clicked on the links provided by those bloggers, and suddenly I had entered the gates of Blogville, discovering and entire world of people both different and the same as me. As a result of reading and commenting in their blogs, they kindly returned the favor. My number of views and comments shot up.

I discovered you get as much out of blogging as you put into it.

Though my blog focuses mostly on God and my spiritual journey, I have readers who believe differently, many staunchly. I return the favor and read them because they are still great people with whom I share many other interests. Plus, they never fail to teach me something, make me laugh, or make me cry.

This is because most people around here are not cliquish. Their doors are always open, and they are more than willing to walk through doors they haven’t seen before.

As Michael Wonch said, this isn’t high school. If you’re new here, remember that. If you see what appears to be an exclusive group, step on in. You will discover our backs are never turned, but you will meet us full on, eyes sparking, smiles wide, and arms outstretched wide to receive you.

Many times, you must make the first move.

Last Note: My apologies if many of you feel this subject should have been buried long ago, but I'm a bit late to this, and felt (yes felt ) the need to address it.