What I'm thinking about today. . . |
My stomach is still in knots after seeing "United 93" this afternoon. It was a very good movie, filmed like a documentary almost, but it's so wrenching that you can't just walk out of the theater and be over it. I started a review, and I hope I can get it written--with a few original thoughts. It'll be a challenge. I got a certified letter that my pain management doctor is letting me go. We'd had words--a discussion--but I didn't think he was going to toss me. This is the second pain management doctor that I've had a falling out with. I wasn't real happy with results from this second pain management doctor, after over a year of seeing him, so it's for the best I'm sure. I made an appointment to see the orthopedic doctor on Friday. He's the one who referred me to pain management, and I'm sure he has another person he can refer me to, or something. Both doctors have had "issues" because I'm bipolar. I don't think it's ethical to schedule, then perform, a steroid back shot, and collect over $1,000 for his work--then immediately release me because we've had a falling out. But, it's not worth fighting about, like I did with the first doctor. If I respond I only make myself more angry, and it's not worth it in the big picture. I went to see "United 93" to get me out of my own world of problems, and I guess it worked. I can't help being bipolar, and certain people are going to back off because I'm not "normal". If a doctor doesn't feel competent to help me, I guess God's doing me a big favor by getting me out of that doctor's care. I just hope my only remaining option isn't going to be neck surgery. If it is, I'll deal with it. You can only do what you can do. I'm glad that the "Idol" to leave this week wasn't Taylor. I really like Katharine by now, and I like Elliott too. With only four "Idols" left, they all have to be good, and they are. If my stomach ever stops quaking over the movie, I'm going to work on the review with pen and paper, rather than at the computer. I have another task, from my tutee (Is that what you call a person you tutor? It doesn't sound right.) He pointed me to a 15 page overview of the computer operating system that he needs to review tomorrow evening. It'll be a good review for me, because I didn't understand that stuff when I first learned it. It ought to make more sense to me now, and if it makes sense to me, I can help him to understand. I guess I'll focus on the little good I can do, rather than all the negative one gets exposed to on a daily basis. I bought a new carton of butter pecan ice cream to help matters of consolation. Somehow, no matter what befalls us, we've got to work to keep our chins up, okay girlfirends? |