MY HEART ON PAPER !

Dec. 27th, 2005

Well, you came home for a couple of days for Christmas. They were wonderful, but they would have been more wonderful if we could have had more time together. But, I really shouldn't complain because you made my Christmas. No, you made this the best Christmas ever for me. You will really never know.

At the Christmas Party Saturday night, you stood up in front of everybody and read the poem you wrote for me, then sang that song, "Hey Mama" to me.

Here's the words to the poem you wrote:

Entitled: Guardian Angel

I wrote this poem graciously, about a dream that I had.
I had a vision of an Angel, and this Angel was very sad.
She said she'd been there for me through the good times and the bad,
To lift me up if I fell, and hold me tight when I was sad.
As she explained, I watched woefully, tears fall from her eyes.
I never realized any being, could make such sacrifice.
I asked her why she was so very sad on this fine day?
She said I never appreciated her in the right way.
She said, "You never really showed me what I needed so bad..."
And I knew at that moment I'd give her all that I had.
So I went up to the Angel, and gave her a soft kiss,

(at this time you came up to me and gave me a kiss on the cheek)

I said, "Thank you, I love you and don't ever forget this:
That you're always appreciated, no matter how it seems.
I'm not always able to show you what my heart really means...
But just know that I love you, and I'll always be right here!
And at that moment I awoke with both my eyes full of tears,
And I knew what it meant to have someone care so much,
Especially with all the problems, our depression and such...
With everything in my life that brings me down and breaks my spirit,
She will always defend me and give me hope with no limit.
I could have never made it this far in my life without you,
Cuz Mother, you are an Angel, and more than life I Love You!!!

Oh son, there's so much I could say, but I don't know if you'd ever get it. I love you just doesn't touch, or begin to say how you've made me feel. Sometimes I love you so much it hurts. I really don't think you'll ever understand such a feeling.

I know this was the worst Christmas for you and I'm so sorry. I love you baby.

Later...