He Takes My Heart With Him

The Plastic Surgeon

The appointment with the plastic surgeon went well. The surgeon was wonderful, as we've come to find all the doctors at the children's hospital to be. He explained that the pediatric plastic surgeons are brought in to "close," because they overlap the muscles and tissue. Everyone's spine is bone, covered with skin. Because Jack's spine will need to be protected better, they pull the muscles, that are usually on either side of the spine, to overlap the spine. This gives the spinal cord more protection, especially for any possible leakage of spinal fluid. The various layers of skin and muscle will be overlapped, in varying degrees, so that there will not be straight sutures to the spinal cord.

The surgeon was confident and very kind. We felt so much better after speaking with him. One of our great worries for after surgery was how we were going to try to keep an eleven-month-old still until he healed. The surgeon said that 99.95% of children healed with no problems, due to leakage or infection, with this type of closure.

It's funny, isn't it, how my journal entries go from completely emotional to completely factual. I feel like that a lot. People ask me about Jack and I launch into a lecture on the basics of tethered spinal cords and surgical interventions. I calmly discuss bladder reflux, which Jack also has, and the varying degrees (Jack has level II). Medical terminology is fluent and common. Plans and schedules are set for my husband's work, for both of our daughters' school, for after-school activities. . .

I explain, and plan, and discuss, and decide. And try to forget why we're doing it all.