Zee Blog

I'm one of the 20%

Holy crap I'm doomed! DOOMED! DOOMED TO BE ALONE AND A LOSER! YARGH!

::sobs::

So boredom reigns with the man who has nothing else to do at the moment, and so as I'm watching TV after writing for a bit a commerical comes on for that E-Harmony site and I figure, "Hey, why not give it a shot just to see what they have to say." Hell, if for some reason I did it and it said, "You have 6000 matches in your area" I might consider myself in a good position, right? Well...I'll let them say it in their own words:

Unable to Match You at This Time
eHarmony is based upon a complex matching system developed through extensive research with married couples. One of the requirements for successful matching is that participants to fall within certain defined profiles. If we find that we will not be able to match a user using these profiles, we feel it is only fair to inform them early in the process.

We are so convinced of the importance of creating compatible matches to help people establish happy, lasting relationships that we sometimes choose not to provide service rather than risk an uncertain match.

Unfortunately, we are not able to make our profiles work for you. Our matching model could not accurately predict with whom you would be best matched. This occurs for about 20% of potential users, so 1 in 5 people simply will not benefit from our service. We hope that you understand, and we regret our inability to provide service for you at this time.

Holy crap. Granted, honesty is wonderful...but shit, why don't they just ask for your address so they can send you the sterile razorblades to cut your wrist with.

Christ on a cross.