Jonah's Journey

speaking his language

Jonah was up several times last night, which proved exhausting for Andy and me. Jonah still sleeps in his crib -- we don't know how we'd enforce bedtime if he didn't, and he doesn't seem to mind being in there, so we say if it ain't broke, don't fix it.

For some reason he doesn't jump or climb out, though we're sure he could if he wanted to. Instead, when he wakes up and wants out, he'll whimper and cry until one of us comes to get him.

Usually we'll just hold him on the couch with a sippy cup full of milk until he's tired enough to put back in his crib -- though often I am so numb with exhaustion that I barely know what I'm doing.

Luckily, Jonah usually sleeps through the night now, waking at 5:30am or 6, which sounds ridiculously early but is much better than midnight AND two-fifteen AND four-thirty AND six.

This morning Jonah wanted me to dance with him -- something I've been doing lately. I put a cd in the player and pick him up and kind of jump up & down to the music. Usually I don't even make it through a song before I have to rest -- the kid is heavy -- maybe 35 pounds -- and I am not in great physical shape, being a geeky weakling and all. (His favorite song right now is "Lemon Tree" by Trini Lopez).

He indicates that he wants to dance with me by taking my hand in his little hand and leading me over to the stereo, where he then guides my hand to the power button. For a kid who can't talk, Jonah is pretty good at telling you what he wants.

They use a PECS (picture exchange system) book at school, and he is learning how to choose a picture of a cookie and then hand that picture to the teacher to indicate that he wants a cookie.

When I first heard about PECS I was very reluctant to try it. Why not just teach the kid to talk? I thought. But Jonah's developmental pediatrician explained to Andy and me that autistic children have a hard time processing language because to them words are often no different than other noises...music...cars passing...pots and pans banging together....whatever.

In fact there is no guarantee that Jonah will ever talk. We can, however, teach him to communicate, using sign language and the PECS. He can sign "more" and "please" and "book" and "bird" -- that's it, mostly. It's very cute when we are reading a book together and we come to a page with a robin or a duck --and Jonah pinches his tiny thumb and forefinger together to sign "bird."

My dad came over at 9:30am to have breakfast with us for Easter before going off with his lady friend to her family's party. I was crabby and tired, and so was Jonah. Andy played the hero by remaining calm and quiet and cooking the breakfast.

At one point I started to babble to Jonah: "mishy magga fan oy," I said. My dad turned to me and said "Don't do that." I raised my eyebrows at him and said "I'll do it if I damn well want to." He backed down, which is unusual. He amended his comment: "Don't do that in front of your mother."

* Note: My parents have been divorced for more than twenty five years, yet both still enjoy getting their digs in, though neither would admit it.

But seriously. Don't tell me not to talk to my son in his language. We carry on entire conversations this way. Open your minds, o parents of mine. There is more than one way to teach, more than one way to listen.

My God, I'm tired.







"Whenever I'm caught between two evils, I take the one I've never tried."
         ~ Mae West (1892 - 1980)

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