Monkeys

Somethings you can't let pass

There are some things in your life that will happen that you just can't let pass. There are a lot of things in my life that I've let pass. There are others that I like to think I am over....but then I am so brutally reminded of the hurt all over again.

Last night, a friend of the family gave birth to a still born child. Roseanne and Dave have one little girl, this was to be their second. Monday they ahd a sonogram, and everything was fine. They said the baby girl should be about 6 lbs, 9ozs and be born anytime in the next 3 weeks. Tuesday, the baby was kicking all day, and Wednesday morning, there was no movement. Roseanne called the DR about 9:30, and said that there had been no movement sicne 6:30am. The Dr told her that she should come in for an exam just to be sure. After the exam, there was no heartbeat, and the baby was gone at that point. She carried from Early Wednesday afternoon until last night, knowing that their daughter would be born dead. And indeed she was. My heart is hurting so bad right now. I talked to my mom tonight, and she told me that Dave came into her job today, and begged ger to please be ther for his family at the services. My mom reassured him that she would be there....and he just crumbled into her arms and let it all loose. He cried for their daughter, he cried for his wife....he cried for himself. And, he cried for me. For when I lost my baby almost 2 years ago. He said that at that point, he couldn't imagine how I felt, and now he knows....and he's so sorry. In one of the most sad moments in life, he was sorry for me. For my family. And you know...I don't know how to help them. I don't know what to do. I am a thousand miles away....and I want to go to them, to hug Roseanne, and tell her that it will be okay. I know it will. It just takes time. Time is not something that we all want to wallow in. Time sucks.

And you know...I've had plenty of time....and tonight, my heart was ripped open again, and I hurt all over. I want to help them....but I don't know how. How do you do that?

I don't know....I'm just hurting again...and I don't want to anymore. I want it to go away...and I never want to see anyone else go through this again. It hurts. Unlike anything I can describe. Worse than the worst physical injury that you can imagine. It goes so deep into the soul....you feel so lost...alone. Incomplete.

Tonight, I hurt. I hurt for Dave and Roseanne. For the burden that will forever hinder them, and for every little remembrance they'll have to endure. I don't know how to help them. And I want to. I need to.

Please pray for Dave and Roseanne, and their daughter, Haley. She is only 2, and will not understand why she isn't going to have a little sister. Pray that God heals their hearts and that good does come out of this. That God has a magnificant plan for this.

Thank you in advance for what I know you will do for this family who is so completely devastated.

Lifting them up before Him,
Beckie