trapped in a soap opera

things got a lil interesting last night

Yeah well i guess thats a pretty good summary of yesterday. so lets see......

I didnt call timmy on thurs cause i really didnt have much to say and i figured if he wanted to talk to me then he could call. well he didnt--no big deal--didnt really think he would. I had originally planned this weekend to get into explanations of all the stuff that ive said and to make sure that he still wanted to be with me.

well.....yesterday on the way home we stopped to see michael (beccas b/f) so timmys was on the way too so i was going to stop and say hi to him (or at least let becca see the truck since ive been telling her about it) Anyway i couldnt get ahold of him so we were just going to swing by and look at the truck. when we got there hte truck AND corvette were there and so was another car. i thought i had seen the car before and it was one of our friends (a guy and his wife) so i though nothing of it. i knew he was home but he didnt answer the phone so i just left--figured he was in the shower or something.

anyway so, i figure hell call back when he gets out or whatever, so i go home and leave a msg that we were going to come by but missed him (or something to that effect). time goes by and he doesnt call back. well, i wanted to go out since i quit drinking during the week. i was really looking forward to drinking a beer or two. unfortunately david was out of town--michael paul doesnt have a cell phone, and patrick wasnt there yet (didnt know he had a cell phone at the time). anyway finally got fed up and called him about 10 left another message saying that i had wanted to explain those things, but was tired of trying to get ahold of him so if he wanted to know he could call me.

well i gave up on the theory of going out--but at 1 am patrick called--the bartender had told him that i called looking for him. anyway he came and picked me up and we went out there. well turns out that timmy was there with another girl--i never did see her actually but judy said she wasnt much to look at. apparenly they just went out to the car or somethign for a few hours cause they didnt leave but they disappeared. I didnt really pay attention cause i didnt really care but didnt want him to think i did by staring. i just had a good time.

so anyway i said something to michael paul about well he could have just answered the phone and said he wasnt interested anymore. to this MP said that he may still be interested but just wanted something a lil crazy that night (which sounds entirely like him--and me too i guess). at the time i said that didnt bother me--and it didnt. but i thought about it later and although ive had relationships before where were allowed to sleep with other ppl--and i have no problem with it--i just dont feel like fucking with it again. i didnt really want a man in the first place and getting in a complicated situation with one just isnt that appealing to me.

the thing that kinda annoyed me was that i am only in town about 5 days a month--could he not have done that sometime when i wasnt here..seems kinda stupid to me. the long and the short of it though is im done with him. we may still hang out from time to time and i may tease him or something, but i dont really want to get into anything with him or sleep with him. too bad i didnt figure this out BEFORE i got in a wreck cause i was mad at him. oh well we live an learn.

well im really tired so im gonna go to bed now. later