The Very Secret Diary of Circe

Dying Again

Just when i thought i'd reached the bottom
I'm dying again

I'm going under
drowning in you
I'm falling forever
I've got to break through
I'm going under

i'm dying again

so go on and scream
scream at me i'm so far away
i won't be broken again
i've got to breathe i can't keep going under



I am dying again. And I’m so fucking sick of it! I’m so fucking sick of the way people can make me feel. The way I can make myself feel. I’m not killing myself physically, but I am killing myself. I can feel every word rip through me.

And every time he comes and says things, I cannot take it. I don’t need to be empathic for him to rip me apart. He sucks everything I have. He thinks I’m the vampire, but it’s him. every moment of my day begins to revolve around him. his every problem rests on my shoulders, and I’m expected to know what to say, what to do to make it better.

Well I can’t! I can’t put him back together. Fuck, I can’t even put myself back together! I’m sick of falling into these days of depression. I’m sick of being the one he comes too. And I know this sounds selfish, but it’s true. I cannot take being his shoulder to cry on. I don’t want to be that to anyone. Maybe it would be okay if I only had to expect this once in a while, but everyday is too much to ask of me! It’s too much to ask me to be his healer. It’s too much for him to come to me and say how wonderful everything is, and how talented her is at everything, to rub it in my face, then come to me and want me to save him.

Well I need to save myself first. Before I can save anyone, I need to be whole. I need to make myself strong. What use is it to come to someone who is already dead, and ask them to fix you?

He thinks the world is out to get him, when maybe it’s just him. I see it everyday, people want to help him and he pushes them away, and complains to me.

God, I’m so sick of wanting to die. I haven’t felt it this strongly for…along while at least.

long lost words whisper slowly to me
still can't find what keeps me here
when all this time i've been so hollow inside
I know you're still there

I can feel you hold me down.

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Jack: Yes, she's safe as I promised, she's going to marry the Commadore as she promised, and you're going to die for her as you promised. You see we're all men of honor, except Elizabeth, who is, in fact, a woman.

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My Fantasy Novel-
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Jack: Yes, she's safe as I promised, she's going to marry the Commadore as she promised, and you're going to die for her as you promised. You see we're all men of honor, except Elizabeth, who is, in fact, a woman.

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

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My Fantasy Novel-
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