trapped in a soap opera

worried

i think i forgot to mention this yesterday, not sure if i did or not. but anyway, apparently some shit got back to greg that wasnt supposed to that Robin said--nothing major it was just stupid shit--but he called her yesterday and went off on her and told her that he was bringing the rest of her shit over. she was supposed to be going with us to play poker, but last time i talked to her she was going to wait for him to bring that shit, then go to Newport and get some liquor and drink till she was shitfaced. By herself of course (all her housemates are on spring break somewhere). Im worried about her cause she hasnt answered her phone since yesterday afternoon--both Perk and i havet tried to call.

Something else im going to say here, because i cant say it to anyone else--Robin has started taking diet pills again--she says that she had an agreement with Greg, but now theyre not together so fuck it. Dont know the whole story about her and diet pills cause i wasnt around then, but apparently she has an eating disorder, and was addicted to them--so her gettin back on them is a really bad thing. so add reason #2 why i'm worried about her.

ok on with the show--i hate being so fuckin cynical. i had a good time with nick the other night but i sit there and measure everything he (ok this goes for every other guy ive ever met too) says to try to figure out if hes just trying to get in my pants or now. its fuckin rediculous. i miss the days when i just believed in people, before everyone decided to fuck me over--and lie to me. yeah i got made a fool of im sure but goddammit it was better than this shit.

ok im just in a fucked up mood and i want to take a nap--maybe ill feel better when i wake up. later