Varying Shades of Gray - My Life

01-03-03

I got to chat with BOH laat night. :):):) It was so good to chat with him. Then JMC came over and chat with him for awhile, too. I'm glad that BOH is doing okay.
I chat with JC early this morning, before he had to go to work. He's hoping that he gets the weekend off so that he come down today. I Should actually be finding out anytime, now.
I still not did get a chance to chat with DA, last night. :( BOH did though. We are all concerned about him. He is just too young, gorgeous and precious to be so damn depressed. I have an idea of what may be bothering him, though. Something about him is just so familiar.
I have been think of ways that I could help him. I have to. I can't explain it. But, I think that at the moment, I may be the only one who can. I'm not trying to sound all grand and mighty there, but something is telling me that I am the only one he will accept help from. I don't know if he will even accept it from me, but I have to try, don't I? I mean, if I don't, then what? I don't even want to think of that.
And about the familiar part? I really think that this is my second chance. A chance to maybe correct what I did/did not do in the past. Sorry, that is a long story and I just can't get into that, at the moment. I cannot let this one down. I cannot fail him. And, I won't.
I have a chance at "redemption", if that is what you wanna call it. Nothing can happen to him. If it does, then as much as people may say that it's not my fault, it WILL be on my hands. Just like the last time. God, I cannot go through that again. The pain. The torture. I won't.

Sorry that this one is so absurd. I just can't go into great details right now. I will say this, though. I will NOT let this one meet the same fate as JVH. (Maybe one day, I will go into that story.)

Have a good day, all.