Varying Shades of Gray - My Life

12-19-02

Just remembered that my nephew's b-day party is tonight. So I won't get to spend much time with JMC when he gets out. But, I have to make time for him also.
Didn't get to chat with BOH last night. Not sure if he was on at all, or maybe, just maybe he wasn't home. Maybe he was happy for once this week. I can hope can't I? I just hope that he didn't think I was being overbearing, by trying to help him. GAWD, I don't want to lose him or his friendship. My love, thoughts and prayers go out to him.
Chatting with Lil D as i write this. We are actually having a pretty good conversation. Of course, I think we always do, wheter it be in person or via chat. She is an amazing woman. Love her so much.
Well, are you ready for another set of new initials? LOL. I've been chatting with a new "friend" for about a week, now and we really hit it off. Nothing about sex just life and all it's BS. Well the other night we (well he) video chatted. And OMG. I had to ask him how old he was. He is almost 16. And he said he was surprised that I am as old as I am. he told that he has been chatting with folks for about six months now and that I am the only one who had been genuinely nice to him. Most people have seen him and said that is friggin ugly or say he's cute only because they wanna get him into bed. He is NOT ugly by any means. he is such a lil cutie and adorable. He did scare me last night. As were talking about that, he said that he just wanted to end it all. OMFG. My heart ank and I felt so crushed. but, then he said, No he just said that and didn't mean it. But still, I wonder and worry about him. before closing the window I read and re-read our conversation, checking to see if I had missed something. I don't see it, yet. I hope he WAS just saying that. That's when he told me about being the only one who was nice to him. Then he thanked me. Awww. Of course I told him he was very welcome. and then just before he signed off and before I could reply he said, "Love ya" and the he was gone. he did tell that he was gonna have to go, but those were his last words. Anyway, his initials are DA, for future reference.
Well, I hope I get to see BOH tonight. Not sure if I will or not because of my nephews B-day party.
I'm not sure what else to write, right now guess I will close.
Have a great day, all.