Thoughts of a Mad Man

Emotional Control: QR: 6 seconds: When to Respond

Today I am looking at the ideas from Frederick Stroebel, MD and his "QR: Quieting Reflex."


Building on the instant change of feeling that a change of body language can bring, we have QR, or the Quieting Response. This book suggests several skills that are useful. The overarching gist of this book is that one should be able to respond to a stress overreaction within six seconds by a change of body language that is immediately effective and eventually begins to function without conscious thought. He deliberately avoids adding in mental skills, like visualization and self talk. These skills are valuable and should be put back in later, when the body is already automated. The point here is that we already have control of the body, and the body language will support whatever mental work we do.


His vision is to learn several things that one would do at the first sign of unneeded tension. So the first thing we need to do is figure out what unneeded tension is, then how to recognize it, and what to do.


If you are crossing a street and a car is about to hit you, then stress is a good thing. You already know how to run to get out of the way, and you don't need to experiment with new and creative ways of doing that. Get out of the path first, then relax and think.


But if there is no immediate danger, and if the concern requires careful thought, then now is the time to tap the gas and get the engine to slow its revs. Toward that end, one should always be scanning the body for signs of tension. These include tight shoulders, sudden movements, stimming, fidgeting, tapping and many more. A few seconds thought would allow you to come up with a few custom signs. More importantly, as you scan your reticular activating system (RAS) will begin to show you these signs as they occur in whatever form they occur. The subconscious mind knows what's happening, and once it knows you want to know, it will make it clear.


Then we need to discuss what will happen when you get that spike in adrenaline.


The expanded discussion is coming later.