Toadette's Story: Book 2

Chapter 79 - Finding the Next Star

“This is unacceptable!” Wario stomped into the tile floor, shattering it. “You not only lost my priceless radar, but you possibly tipped Peach off about our plans!”

“Hey, how was I supposed to know there’d be more than one person inside a volcano of all things?”

With his teeth clenched tightly, Wario gazed down at the vast Diamond City from his elevated building. The city, painted in cool hues, bustled with life as its towering skyscrapers and shopping centres thrived. Its civilians were none the wiser to the grand plans of their leader. Yet now he felt pressured, faced with a time limit.

Even if Peach doesn’t know it’s us specifically, her mushroom dogs will run into us enough times to connect the dots.

“And by the way, an increase in my pay would be appreciated,” the girl whistled, holding up a towel as she walked across the floor barefoot. “I almost became a crispy Mona treat trying to get your precious Ethereal Star.”

“I’d say your little transgressions with the law have been more dangerous than that volcano adventure.”

“As if.”

Wario cleared his throat. “Penny! Get in here!”

Another orange-haired woman came skipping into the room, her lab coat flapping in the breeze. She bumped straight into Mona, adjusted her glasses and continued until she was right behind Wario.

“I can help you how?” Her high-pitched voice made her instantly recognisable.

“Tell Doctor Crygor that I need another Ethereal Star radar to be made.” He pointed to the red object. “The process shouldn’t take four months this go around. I want results within two.”

“Two months? Is that even possible?”

“You eggheads will make it possible.” Wario grinned intensely. “Once this treasure hunt is over, I’ll have more than enough spare dough to have you strapped for life. Retire early, be an ear-destroying singer, pump out some minions… Whatever you want, I will be able to make it happen after obtaining all these stars.”

A smile returned to Penny’s face. “Two months. Done.” The young adult twirled, humming to herself as she danced out of sight.

“The entirety of Diamond City’s gonna be smiling like her when this is all over,” Mona chuckled, dropping her towel. “Now, how do we figure out where these next stars are in the meantime?”

“We’re not completely screwed.” Wario sat in his chair, leaning back while Mona got on her knees. “Clearly we’ll have to rely on long-distance help… And I know just the person.”

***

Waking up to find Toadette’s toes twitching in his mouth wasn’t Captain Toad’s idea of a great morning.

As he felt his tongue trapped between two of the toes, he slowly shifted her leg in an attempt to free himself. And yet it was as if Toadette’s big toe snagged him like a fish on a line; he silently struggled to plop it out of his mouth. Her long nail undoubtedly played a role, along with the natural length of her toes.

The girl appeared to be completely out of this world, her mouth partially open.

If you wanna invade my mouth, fine. I’ll invade yours.

Toad finally got her toes out of his mouth, shivering upon seeing a small strand of pink hair on the big one. After moving her legs to the side, he crawled forward until his face was above hers.

Without a moment’s hesitation, he pushed his mouth against hers. Mustering all the saliva he could, he unleashed a waterfall of spit into her mouth. It was as sensual as it was insulting, and he grabbed her head to ensure she couldn’t break his kiss. Licking inside her drool-heavy mouth sent blood rushing to his penis. He especially felt a boost to his energy once his tongue broke past the barrier of her teeth. As his tongue tickled hers, he let out a sigh.

“That is so wrong.”

Toad groaned. He looked over the side of the bunk bed and saw Minh watching him. Or perhaps she simply heard his obnoxious, dog-like licking as he tasted Toadette’s mouth.

“You’re one to talk,” he said, holding up his middle finger. “We’ve all had some sleepy action before.”

“Have we?”

“Lemme tell you: jerking off on my little cousin’s butt during a sleepover was pretty eye-opening.”

Minh’s eyes widened. “Excuse me?”

“She’s only two years younger than me.”

“That’s not the…” Minh shook her head. “I’ve never done anything to Toadette in her sleep before.”

“For real?” Toad stared at his sleepy love. “What about anyone else? I mean, knowing you’re a foot fag and all now, there’s no way you couldn’t resist someone’s gross feet under the sheets.”

Minh looked out the boat’s window, the vast ocean continuing to surround the group.

“Older cousins.”

“There we go.”

“I guess… I guess I feel more comfortable taking the risk with my family sleeping versus friends.” She looked at her own socked feet. “It’s easier.”

“Because you know them, so you’re probably an expert in knowing how not to wake them up.” He leaned in. “So you mean to tell me you’ve been sucking on that annoying waitress’ toes for this past week?”

“She was mostly at my folks’ house. But I’ve worshipped her feet before. When we were younger.”

“And I bet they matched her personality: salty and unappealing.”

“Nah. She’s got a whole closet full of beauty products. You can bet her feet are always covered in lotion.” Her face started to turn red. “She’s got skinnier feet than me, too.”

“And that’s a plus?”

“Yeah.”

“Eh, knowing just how freaky some of you foot addicts can be now, there’s someone out there who’d love that your feet are as chunky as they are.”

“Hey!”

“Don’t start with the ‘don’t call me fat’ crap this morning,” Toad snapped. “I’m complimenting you, idiot. Just embrace that your feet are so plumpy and wide and watermelon-y.”

Minh groaned. “Stop talking.”

“Even if your feet were truly ugly, like some old hags I’ve seen, it wouldn’t make a difference.”

“Oh yeah? Why?”

“You know that cheesy expression: it’s what’s inside that counts.” He got out of the bed and kissed Minh on the mouth. “If it didn’t have some truth, Miss Raggedy Hair up there wouldn’t be all grabby-grabby with you.”

As he went into the bathroom, Minh looked at the still-sleeping Toadette.

***

“I swear I brushed my teeth last night.” Toadette cringed as she walked through the frigid streets of Toad Town. “Tastes like I’m gargling somebody else’s spit.”

“Who knows why?” Toad asked, smiling widely.

“Oh. Oh, you are nasty!” She smacked her fellow mushroom into a streetlamp. “What’d you do—literally spit in my mouth?”

“A little revenge for waking up with your toes in mine.”

“At least my toes can be delicious.”

Upon reaching the castle at 10:30, their priority was getting to the princess. They caught her in the castle’s basement, walking through the semi-flooded floor. She locked the door behind her, and her posture stiffened once she saw the two mushroom people.

“You’ve returned in one piece.” Peach adjusted her hair. “How does it feel to be rescued by your inferior, captain?”

“Don’t give her all the credit. I could’ve escaped on my own.”

“But you didn’t,” Toadette sang.

“Yeah, about that, I was attacked.”

“By whom?” Peach asked.

Toad then proceeded to tell the story to the princess about the mysterious girl who sought the same treasure he had discovered. But he knew that without anything else to go on, Peach wouldn’t be able to guess the girl’s identity, let alone bother chasing her. Fortunately for the explorer, what he pulled out of his breast pocket could have been a major hint.

“This must be what she was using to track it down,” he remarked, handing Peach the device. “Must be something real valuable for her to be willing to kill me over it.”

“Ethereal Stars?” Peach read the engraved text on the front of the machine.

“Pretty awesome name. Sounds otherworldly,” Toad chuckled.

Peach continued staring into the device. Suddenly it felt like sweat was trying to force itself out her body. She thought back to months ago, then swiftly looked back to the Toads.

“You two are to find the rest of these stars immediately.”

“What?” “Huh?”

Peach grabbed them by their arms and led them up to her room. Once inside, she brought them to a secluded corner where absolutely nobody would overhear them. Her face was filled with concern, yet she maintained a serious demeanour.

“Whenever somebody is hunting notable stars, it often means they’re up to no good,” she explained. “Take it from years of experience.”

“That star is pretty large,” Toad said, “but it could just be a hunk of rock.”

“True. If it had some phenomenal cosmic powers or something, motorcycle girl would’ve used it,” Toadette added. “How dangerous could these stars really be?”

Peach looked at Toadette like she was an idiot.

“Have you forgotten that Wario is the head of the same family that you messed with numerous times, Toadette?”

“Wario? What does that orc have to do with this?”

Peach peered at Toad. “The timing of this would line up with what you told me about their new plans, would it not? The Scapellis? It’s worth considering the possibility that they’re behind this.”

Toadette gulped. Being a target terrified her enough in Mushroom City, but now she was a target on her own home grounds? Was there a single place she could stand and be safe? Before Toad could utter a word, she stepped forward.

“How many of these stars are there?”

“I haven’t a clue. I will conduct my own research on these Ethereal Stars in the meanwhile. You, on the other hand, are to figure out how this little doohickie functions and find what you can. Are we clear?”

“Let me see this.” Toad clicked a few buttons. “Either the stars are powerful, or this thing is weak. It can only detect one of their energies at a time for some reason.”

“Well isn’t that just great news,” Toadette groaned. “There could be one literally under our feet right now, and we won’t even know it.”

“But it’s got colour! The one the motorcycle girl has, the red one, isn’t showing up. But this orange one should be somewhere in Rose Town from these coordinates.”

“Why don’t we just storm into Wario’s city, knock on his door and arrest him?” Toadette asked.

Toad scoffed. “It might be part of the Mushroom Kingdom, but it’s still his own territory. Plus, you don’t think he’s got that city defended? Even if his defence were down, he’s not your average human.”

“Okay. By that logic, can’t Her Highness handle him? I know she’s not a weakling.”

“I’m not,” Peach said. “But among the various gifted humans in the kingdom, I unfortunately reside near the bottom of the totem pole. That monster could snap me like a twig if he wished.”

“And we’re not going to let that happen,” Toad snapped, grabbing Toadette’s hand. “Let’s get to prepping, rookie.”

Toadette sighed, smiling. “At least this time, we won’t have to butt heads with anybody.”

“I’m counting on you both,” Peach shouted with a smile, waving to her loyal workers.

***

Penny was at her desk in WarioWare, Inc., working on a schedule to help her and her grandfather create a second Ethereal Star Radar. Despite her confidence, the chemist knew it would be hard to create one of these from scratch again. Simply gathering the materials needed to detect the stars’ energy could take weeks.

“Shipping from Sarasaland… Ooh, even shipping to the mainland Mushroom Kingdom will be…”

Suddenly her door swung open, and a familiar face entered.

“Hey, I’m about to head out,” Mona said, waving. “You think you’ll really be able to pull this off in two months?”

“If I channel my inner 9-Volt and stock up on snacks and a bottle for my pee, possibly.”

“You’ll never let that boy live that incident down, huh?”

“I never recovered from it,” Penny said, drinking water. “Tasted like sugar and ammonia.”

“Good thing no one’s ever eaten from your barf bag,” Mona teased. She lifted herself onto the desk. “And don’t let Wario scare you too hard. We’ve still got a plan we’re following in the meantime.”

“Great,” Penny sighed. “Ten percent less stress.”

“Puh-lease, I’m the one with the real tough job. Haven’t I told you how I almost got melted in lava?” Mona began to relay the story to Penny, who, despite the action and thrill, continued to type with great precision. “And that mushroom girl? She’s the reason you’re stuck building a new radar. Ooh, I can’t wait to see her again and really show that fungus what I’m made of. Especially after she nearly made me puke with her foot.”

“Huh?”

“You don’t wanna imagine it.” A sudden sneeze escaped her. “It was like dirty cheese.”

Penny’s hands flew to her ears, her typing halted as a wave of nausea washed over her. Mona’s smirk widened as she noticed the flush creeping up Penny’s cheeks. Time to tease her some more?

“I’m dead serious, Penny. Cheese! Like the smelliest, ripest, most inhumane—”

“I believe you,” Penny blurted out. “I just had grilled cheese for my lunch.”

“Mmm. Let’s just hope there weren’t any toenail clippings mixed in. You know how I sometimes cut my nails around here.”

“No!”

“Or perhaps good ol’ 5-Volt’s foot shavings from when she has to punish dear 9-Volt.”

“Quit it!”

“Or a hot, steaming load of Ashley’s cursed toe jam!”

“Gah!!” Penny took a deep breath and began singing at max volume. “She’s got her hair tied up in braids and glasses perched up on her face!”

Now Mona was the one with her hands clamped over her ears. Penny’s off-key warbling was like nails on a chalkboard. It was so shrill that the glass of Penny’s own monitor threatened to break. The poor technology was pained to be in her very presence.

“Okay, I’m done!” Mona smacked the girl’s mouth shut. “Ow, my ears, Penny!”

“I think I need the barf bag,” Penny gasped, feeling dizzy.

“Suck it up. You’ll be fine.” Mona hopped off the desk. “You’re reacting like I’m stabbing you by describing dirty feet, meanwhile I bet yours probably smell just like that mushroom’s.”

“No way!” Penny put her hands on her hips. “I can’t be the best pop sensation the world’s ever seen with feet that smell like garbage.”

“Confident, huh? If you’re so sure, lemme get a whiff.”

“Y-You wanna smell my feet?” Penny’s cheeks were bright red.

“Don’t pretend like this is for my own good. I just wanna see you eat those words, brainiac.” Mona flashed her a grin. “You chicken?”

Penny sulked, her lips forming a stubborn pout. Despite being older than Mona, the chemist always seemed so pathetic next to the recent high school graduate. Mona could go toe-to-toe with the police of other cities without trembling, while Penny felt like she was dying just from sniffing the wrong objects. However, with Wario plotting his greatest attack yet, perhaps it was time for Penny to show a little courage.

Mona was already exposed to her singing, so what would it hurt to give her a sample of her feet? Except for the fact that Penny had boots on all day, so it was a gamble if they’d truly reek or smell as polished as she hoped.

Gulping, Penny peeled off the pink boot from her right foot, the sound reminiscent of stretchy gum. Mona leaned in, a menacing snicker escaping her lips.

Off the sock came.

“Oh. Colour me surprised.”

Penny’s foot was as generic as they came. It was virtually spotless, save for a few stray threads from the sock. Complemented by a soft blush, nobody would suspect that her foot smelt foul at a first glance.

“Now for the moment of truth,” Mona declared. “Will the great Penny Crygor’s feet smell as fresh as Mona’s panties or as rancid as Wario’s crusty socks? Let us find out!”

Her nose jammed its way under Penny’s toes, inhaling deeply. Penny put her hands over her mouth, letting out a gasp.

But why wasn’t Mona backing up? Why wasn’t she immediately teasing Penny from the inevitable stench of her toes? Why did she sport a look of confusion?

“Aw, that’s not fun.”

Penny’s foot had an impressively clean smell, as if she’d recently dragged a disinfectant wipe from her heels to her toes. There was a hint of citrus in the air that made Mona’s nose twitch. But it honestly didn’t smell any different than if Penny had just washed her hands in her lab.

Heck, her foot had a more tolerable scent than most of the chemicals she played with.

“Haha! Told you so,” Penny said, playfully punting Mona in the face.

“At least your future boyfriend won’t dread the thought of giving you foot massages,” Mona chuckled as she wiped her hands on her shirt. “Hey, let me quit distracting you before Wario starts paying you even less.”

“Catch you later, alligator,” Penny replied.

“Or maybe to prove you’re not a total chicken, you could take a sniff of my boots.”

“Out.”

“Bawk-bawk-bawk!” Mona snickered as she shut the door. “See ya.”

Now alone, Penny brought her foot up to her nose and took three rapid sniffs.

“Ah… So orangey. All that foot care really is paying off.” She took a fourth sniff, smiling as she got back to working on the plans to produce the Ethereal Star radar.

***

With the sky glowing orange and sporting a hint of violet, Toadette was set to head to Rose Town. The nineteen-year-old jogged in place outside Peach’s castle, waiting to be joined.

“How’s that caffeine working for you?” Toad flicked her in the head from behind.

“Make sure we pick up Minh.”

“How about we don’t?”

“Why not?” She pouted.

“Because all she’ll do is distract you. Do I really have to tell you why?”

“Boy, I’ve been very helpful.”

“The fuck?” Toad backhanded Minh, nearly snapping her head off her neck. “Real genius move, Toadette, telling the chatterbox about the mission we’re trying to keep under wraps.”

“Chillax. I just told my people I’m going to Rose Town for a bit,” Minh responded, wincing as she rubbed her cheek. “Ain’t like they know we’re hunting these Everlasting Stars.”

“Ethereal Stars,” he huffed. “And who exactly are we counting as your people?”

“Mom, Dad, Sofia because she called me, and outside of them, I told Tayce T., Russ T., Fice T., and I think I told…”

I’m surrounded by retards, the captain lamented.

“Rose Town is about thirty kilometres from here,” Toadette explained. “From memory, five hours of walking means we’ll end up there by the dead of night.”

Toad burst out laughing, unable to resist getting louder when he realised Toadette was serious.

“You must be out of your mind if you think we’re walking there at this hour. Like I’m trying to be eaten up by tons of mosquitoes.” He fished a set of keys from his pocket.

“Rose Town ain’t exactly car-friendly,” Minh said, raising an eyebrow.

“Exactly,” Toad replied. “All those empty dirt roads mean we won’t be slowed down by traffic like we would in Mushroom City.”

“If we’re driving, I’m calling shotgun,” Toadette declared, pushing herself against Toad’s chest. “I hope this isn’t a brand-new car.”

“Why’s that?”

“Because that dashboard’s gonna be real sad.” She slipped her nyloned foot out her flat and began to rub it along the top of his boot. “Depressed, maybe.”

----------

Author’s Note:
Yeah, including Penny means that I can’t use that as a nickname for Penelope anymore. Her and Mona’s scene was the last section written in this chapter, reflecting a frustrating thing I see all the time: people (mainly women) insisting that their feet smell horrible—absolute vile. And yet they offer next to no odour whatsoever. It’s akin to calling your feet dirty when there are only a few specks of sand on them.

Next week will see the trip to Rose Town commence. Do you like flip-flops? How would you feel if somebody’s sandalled feet pressed down on your lap during a drive?