Left-overs piled on hot rice and mixed. |
Pannya (Pan) is sad tonight. At least he's not catatonic. I realize that love comes in all colors. So... what is my love-color for him? Saffron? I do care... a lot. If I didn't my life would be easier... or not. At times we are like two broken trees leaning into each other. Sometimes... that's good enough. Pan washed the clothes today but not before we straightened out our misunderstandings. Clothes didn't get clean last time because the load was too large. I also explained that my clothes can't be put in the dryer... so he only dried the blankets. It all worked out. The clothes smell clean. The blankets are dry and the hung clothes will be dry by tomorrow. Tonight? He's sad, thinking too much and refusing to eat properly because he doesn't want to get fat... I could scream. He needs to eat. His medications are potent and must be taken daily (at three strikes a.k.a. 21:00). In the meantime I have work to do. My chromebook has been acting up. I have to finish this entry, copy-paste just in case it crashes. I cannot afford to lose this entry and cannot reconstruct it. When I post it I'll turn on the television and hopefully wake Pan up so he takes his meds. I think... not sure... that the final episode of "I feel you linger in the air" airs tonight. It's an awesome historical (1920s Chiang Mai) time travel Thai BoyLove series of 12 episodes. Very moving. Excellent acting, lovely cinematography, lovingly done. I'll re-watch it with subtitles. I wrote something silly in response to Jack's post, but that's how my Muse a-muses himself. I've had silly outbursts that transform into serious writing before. Wish I could write a Thai BL that way. K.E. To tj-turkey-jobble-jobble-hard-J in "Unexpected Road Trip" : "I don't understand American Insurance... other than... the rich must get richer and the health of the poor doesn't matter. Even the poor in Thailand are treated better. Clinic visit is 30 baht ($1). 3 hours and $5 will get me to Khon Kaen. *sigh* There's so much about Thailand that annoys me but I may have to stay here or move to another cheap country because I'm poor in the US. Sleeping, seeing and hearing is important though. So... good luck." To Mouse says gobble gobble in "Invalid Entry" : "I've had problems with my chromebook. Amazing how some of us raised on paper and pencil (as a left-hander... always smudged) can barely remember what that was like. Some of us need more down time than others. I crave connections but not interruptions. Are their mental-physical-emotional health resources closer to where you live and more convenient? I ask because Pan's doctor is an 8+ hour bus ride away. He goes 3 or 4 times per year. Still not easy." To QPdoll is Grateful in "Random Thoughts" "I made mistakes all the time. I don't think I fully appreciated how having a good boss made a huge difference until I had a couple that added a lot of stress. A scholarship or grant can make a huge difference. I couldn't go where I wanted to go because of our finances. I have lived alone for years. Sharing this place with Pan has been great for my health and well-being. I'm not sure that I want to be on my own anymore. I'm adjusting to a different stage of life." To hammer48 in "Invalid Entry" "I write short poetry... sometimes short prose. What do my prose and poetry share? They're short. My Muse is not as short-of-breath or as short-sighted or as short as I am but he's a tad fickle. Alexander Pretorius Mayberry Alexandrovic a.k.a. Aliosha was as huge as a mini-planet... and his ears as large as an elephant. He could hear my footsteps dancing on the rings of Saturn even though he was on the far side of Pluto. Nothing escaped the attention of my dearest Aliosha. Not even the poisoned stiletto with his name on it. Just a-musing myself! Who knows. I save scraps. Some actually become the genesis of stories. 670 words 311 |