Everyday Canvas

Gossip // Happiness

Prompt: Gossip

What do you think about gossip and have you ever been the target of one? Why do you think gossip grows more and more distorted as it changes hands?

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Yes, I was the target of a gossip at an age and a time when I was young and quite vulnerable. Someone in the family started that gossip, as I found out later. I found out about it when my best friend and cousin congratulated me for getting engaged to a friend of the family. When I told her that wasn't true, she almost didn't believe me at first, although she later did. Imagine!

All this happened because the person who started the rumor supposedly did it with good intentions since she thought we'd make a good couple. At the time, I was in college and had no intention of getting hooked, let alone with that person in question. After learning this, I was disgusted with the people who made up the lie and with those who perpetuated it. In hindsight, it might even have to do, at least partly, with me choosing to marry someone else couple of years later, just maybe to get away from that circle.

Gossip is not just personal information, rumors, or secrets about others, but it has to do with sharing them and causing them to grow and get distorted in the process. It has to do with psychological amplification by each person who repeats such an information with exaggerated and embellished details.

At first, we may think gossip happens due to the need for information as we humans have an innate curiosity about others' lives. Gossip may satisfy that need.

But that is not the only reason. A stronger reason is the human memory and its shortcomings. We are all fallible and our memories are prone to distortion. This is why what we repeat can become emotionally charged and even risky.

Still yet another reason has to do with the character of people who repeat that gossip seeking social validation from others. As sharing gossip and circulating it can also create a group social bond. Then, their lives may be so dull that gossip becomes an entertainment.

We must be wary of gossip and its widespread consequences, especially in these times of social media. Without meaning to, through gossip, we can harm relationships, reputations, and trust among people and communities.

In my case, my cousin did the right thing. Even though she believed that gossip, at least she told me about it. Thank you, dear cuz!

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Prompt: Happiness

What did you expect happiness to be while you were in your younger years and did you find out what it is? If you did, what is it?

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I am still not very sure what true happiness is, although there were times in my life when I thought I had found it. In my youngest years, what I thought my happiness was, at the time, was confined to moments and conditions.

This is because happiness can be defined as a state of well-being and contentment that arises from a combination of positive emotions, satisfaction, and a sense of fulfillment. If so, who in this world can live in such a perpetual state!

Also, happiness can also be a subjective experience, varying from person to person, and it can be influenced by various factors, internal and external. It may have something to do with self-awareness and intentional efforts.

Then, the most likely description of happiness--according to me--can be a deep sense of joy and peace and satisfaction with life in general. Not merely the absence of negative feelings but also the positive one like joy, gratitude, love, and serenity. As to serenity, is it really there in this wild world of ours?

I think we can at least be partially happy if we surround ourselves with meaningful relationships, good social connections, a sense of belonging, plus a passion or an activity that engages us. Taking care of our physical health also may have something to do with happiness.

If you ask the people who think they know about happiness, they'll also add doing acts of kindness as altruism and compassion benefits everyone. They'll add self-reflection, meditation, and self awareness as well as acceptance of the ways of the world. But I wonder if those are fully doable, as lofty as they may sound.

Happiness may just be, as some say, the journey rather than the destination. Thus, to me, it has to be what we deem it is, a personal and unique experience, and what happiness is can change from person to person and it doesn't need to be a forever, perpetual condition.


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