Random Ramblings

Musings

Here I am again.

Do any of you sit in dark rooms and listen to moody music as you ponder life? Or am I just a weirdo?

When I lived with my sister, I would sit on the couch with my laptop as the sole light in the house. I hear that's bad for your eyes. But it's more economical not to have everything lit up, right? That's the excuse I'd make when she came home and scolded me for sitting in the dark. "Hey, I'm saving power ya know!"

She wasn't a fan. Why are people afraid of the dark? I mean, that's a silly question. We're all wired to fear things we cannot see, shapes we cannot define, threats we cannot predict. The unknown is a terrifying subject. Humanity has always feared what it cannot understand, which is why we have countless wars and racism and endless amounts of suffering caused by ignorance.

But darkness... Darkness is a blanket. A soothing void which eliminates visual noise, distractions that would drag our attention away. But of course, it is also a canvas. We project things onto blank spaces, deep seated anxieties, subconscious worries, nebulous terrors, you name it.

I understand people who fear the shadows.

But do they understand me, who wishes to wrap myself in them and hide away from the visible world? Is it a strange request? Perhaps. I am an eccentric individual, after all.

This type of setting is the best one for my creativity, I would argue. I am most at ease in my dim surroundings, free to focus on my projects as the screen sucks in all my attention, pale hands reaching out from the umbra while I pour out the animus within. Let me brood. Leave me to my devices, do not cast light upon my twisted form.

I am a creature of the night.