Alotta Monkey Business

Weather Conspiracy Theory (WC 339, R-E)

Four days into April, which should mean, spring is arriving and winter is over. Songbirds are showing up at the feeder, there's a flock of Robins hanging around the pine trees, the sun is higher in the sky and skunks and raccoons are coming out of their winter slumber.

But is spring here? Oh, hell no! The songbirds are huddled in the shelter of the pine branches, the Robins are standing in the snow, and the skunks and raccoons are getting into trash receptacles in search of food.

For the last two days, the weather has been warmer, just enough to thaw things out a bit and melt a little snow. Saturday the sun did shine, but yesterday was gray and looked like foul weather was approaching. This morning began with thawing temperatures, barely, but soon the snowflakes were fluttering down. Then the wind picked up, a cold, damp, and gusting wind that created the illusion that it was snowing horizontally. Soon enough, the light snow became heavy and by the time I drove home at ten o'clock, roads were slippery, visibility was greatly impaired, and the school was notifying us that the kids would be home early.

I'm hoping the loathsome weather will soon pass over, but the folks at the National Weather Service are telling us it could last until Thursday morning. I'm also wishful for a small amount of the cold, wet, and unsavory snow, but those same folks are saying we may get over a foot of the unscrupulous stuff.

My Mom used to say, "March winds bring April showers and April showers bring May flowers." I mentioned this in the Newsfeed earlier. Where are the showers? Will we have any Flowers?

I'm tired of complaining about shoveling snow, I want to complain about mowing grass instead! Does anyone know if someone made a big mistake with the time change -- instead of an extra hour of daylight it seems we have an extra month of winter!

I seriously think and blame world governments for this; they have jointly invented and built a weather machine and hid it in Antarctica. They are doing this without disclosure in an attempt to slow global warming...

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"Reading soothes the soul, writing sets it free." T.J.