Jots and Tittles and other Random Things

Well, dang...

Yup, I did it. I have an appointment with a bariatric team here in Lubbock on March 9th. It is the baby step towards upending my life (probably) and hopefully on the way to a healthier future.

I'm 5'2" (3" on a good day) and am 276 lbs. So my BMI is around 50%. My A1c is back up to over 8. I have diabetes and high blood pressure and sleep apnea, and fatty liver disease, and congestive heart failure...also the start of arthritis in my knees and ankles and hands...and I'm 57 in June. (How am I still alive? ). So I've done a lot of damage to myself over the years. I had a major health scare last summer, and very nearly died. (It is still surreal to me) I had kidney stones that blocked both kidneys, and the infection turned septic. Not a good thing. I'm grateful to still be in the land of the living. I've heard of a few people with that type of infection who were not as fortunate .

But before all of that happened, I was going to the gym, biking and swimming - losing weight and inches, and had dropped my A1c to 6.8. So getting sick definitely wasn't in my best interest, health-wise or any other-wise. I've been big since having children, and have only gotten bigger. Time to stop!!

My sister, who has always been bigger than me had bariatric surgery last May. She's dropped over 100 lbs, and is getting better all of the time. The confidence she has now is like night and day! I'm so very proud of her.

I'm scared. Not of dying, (but not all that anxious, either to go. I just don't want to end up on a My 600-lb life TV show, nor do I want the rest of my life to be sickly and helpless.

Is this step what I need? I don't know. I just know that I cannot stay like I am. If getting nutrition counseling and a "cheerleader" and getting back to the gym is what I need, then let's do it. If surgery is for me, and I can get clearance and all...then I am willing to go that route. I just know that whatever my choice, I have to upend my life on a permanent basis. No going back!!!

So there you have it, boys and girls, and everyone in between...Today is the first day of the rest of my life. God willing, it will be a longer and healthier one.