The Whatever Files

Silent Movie

Jangly, slightly sinister piano music.

An Intertitle:

"THE WHATEVER"

A gentleman? Clad in black, or white, maybe some greys. An opera hat on his head, and a thick waxed moustache that he strokes and twirls constantly as his mouth moves soundlessly.

An Intertitle:

"Now you see Ms. Schnujo, you are completely at my mercy."

A woman, tied (rather loosely, to some disused railway tracks. The line is obviously rather overgrown. Ms. Schnujo's mouth moves silently.

An Intertitle:

"Send a heartfelt message with a merit badge."

The man laughs theatrically, and also soundlessly.

An Intertitle:

"And no doubt you'll give me 15K Gift Points, for a badge that costs 10K."

Close up of Ms. Schnujo's face.

An Intertitle:

"Yes, of course, and Adherennium will give you two merit badges"

Another Intertitle:

"Just for entering."

The gentleman? looks astonished, with much rolling of the eyes and gurning.

An Intertitle:

"The End"

An Intertitle:

Starring:

Ms. Schnujo as The Lady on the line.

&

Adherennium as Rodney the Rotter

An Intertitle:

Written & Directed by:

Angus Brosnigag

An Intertitle:

Intertitles by:

Hyperbole Advertising llc

THE MOST SUBTLE ADVERTISING COMPANY EVER!