Sandy Supposes....

Monkey Business

May 25th HOME SWEET HOME Blog Prompt: What would happen if Andre opened a bar in your town?

         

         

         

         

         Hmmm, yes, what could possibly happen if a monkey created a bar here in Sundridge? Nothing could go awry, right? It's not as if the locals do not have practice gawking at wildlife.

         Legend has it that a beer-guzzling black bear is not an unusual sight. More than one raccoon has helped itself to a swiped whisky bottle. This masked animal knows all about tipsy. As they imbibe they sway on their feet and stumble into garbage cans.

         I would imagine that serious drinkers don't much care who serves them their 'potion' of choice. As long as the drinks keep coming they are content. Who doesn't appreciate free-flowing suds and/or spirits. Drunks Happy aficionados are simple folk.

         If a monkey, specifically one named Andre, were to operate as a pub master no one would blink an eye. Some imbibers seem to perpetuate reputations as animals, so why would they object to one keeping their buzzes fresh? As long as Andre possesses the necessary skills to crack open bottles and pour he'll impress.The overall aura becomes animal et animal.

         Andre is lucky. He will be able to stock his bar with wares from two nearby breweries. At one he will revel in the unique beers and ales. At the other he will slake his thirst and that of his customers with whisky, moonshine and vodkas.

         I envision this monkey as the silent sort. He probably is not prone to babble on and on in mindless conversation. Many of the locals pride themselves upon being outdoorsmen. While hunkered down in their duck blinds, or perched up in their moose/deer tree-top blinds, or swaying within a moored boat, these persons maintain a noise blackout. They are pro sitters and waiters. No nattering is necessary, or expected. When in a bar they revert to those ingrained habits. They perceive drinking as serious business. No need to expel undue energy with hasty movements. No need for the intrusion of idle conversation.

         Of course, with groups of drinkers anything could occur. Misunderstandings are possible. Inebriation seems to affect if not disable the sense of hearing. Words are blurred. Their context is scrambled. Speech is also impaired. Enunciation is mangled, mumbled, slurred. All of this results in miscommunication, or as some prefer to say reactions.

         Okay, over-reactions might be more accurate. Insults are implied and slung.Perceived slights sting.Animals depend upon their basic instincts. Is that not the fight, or flight response?

         What would animals, imbibing animals, do in such a situation? Would the monkey and his patrons engage in a bar brawl, a free-for-all? Would they screech and swing from the rafters? Would fur fly? Would the participants puff out and beat their chests in acts of attempted intimidation? Would they shove? Would they gouge and scratch?

         I really have no idea what might happen if Andre opened a bar here in Sundridge. I've never owned, or toiled in a drinking establishment. I have no experience and therefore I really mustn't speculate. No insults to Andre, or other like-minded individuals, but is this a form of monkey business and as such isn't that old adage true? Could even a monkey do it?

( word count 543 minus the 18 words of the prompt )