Team Ahimsa Blog Relay, Various Contests

Once Real, Now Intangible - #30DBC

PROMPT November 28th

Hopefully a little change of pace tonight. Write about something intangible: faith, magic, energy, power, or creativity.
Just choose one topic, and write about it.

See my earlier entry and the comments on it:
"Letting my fingers type - #30DBC" 

The voice in my head
is tangible to me
It's the emotional baggage
that I always carry.

It says, "You're the princess
You don't do housework
You sit around, we'll do it
We'll indulge your every quirk."

This voice, in reality
spoke for years (thirty-seven)
Now the voice is in my head
'Coz the speaker is in Heaven.

Yes, I'm upper-middle class
I had a maid to wait on me
Who made my bed, cleaned my room
Cooked the food, did the laundry

I didn't lift a finger
Anywhere at home
And now that she's gone
I feel helpless and alone.

Oh, don't get me wrong
I still have part-timers here
But the voice in my head
Is on full time, my dear!

"That's not your job!
Don't pick that up!
I'll stoop and get it
I'll wash your cup!"

The trouble is, the voice
Isn't real any more
And if I don't do it
Nobody does that chore.

My bed is unmade,
There's no soap near the sink
Nothing is a habit
I get tired coz I have to think!

I once asked my aunt
Was my maid a blessing or a curee
She said - that's a choice you make
It could've been better; could've been worse

Now that she's a memory
And her voice lives on in you
It's your decision whether
What it says is false or true.

You need to grow up
You need to cope
You need to learn to balance
The fatigue with the hope.

Change your own habits!
It can be done
Let her voice guide you
Through the chores one by one.

She was the expert
She'd guide you all right
Let her voice not bring darkness
Let it bring the light.

And when you have done that
How triumphant you'll feel!
Because your victory
Won't be intangible, but REAL!