Complex Numbers

Pompeii Attention Now

Yesterday, I finally got around to seeing Wednesday's episode of Marvel's Loki (and, later, a movie -- see below). So for anyone who's happened to see that episode, today's article is especially fortuitous.

Reconstructing the Menu of a Pub in Ancient Pompeii  
Eat like a first-century Roman, using recent archaeological discoveries as your guide.

In the second century, Pliny the Younger wrote a letter to the Roman historian Tacitus, recounting the early stages of the eruption of Mount Vesuvius in 79 AD.

As this article is about a pub menu, it is even more fortuitous that there is a rare and highly-sought-after beer called Pliny the Younger. It's a triple IPA from Russian River in California, and I've never had it because I generally dislike West Coast IPAs.

A day after Pliny observed that dark cloud, a small tavern in a northeastern section of Pompeii collapsed, along with the rest of the town, under the weight of pumice and ash. This was later followed by a fast-moving pyroclastic surge of hot gas, volcanic debris, and ash that signaled the volcano’s final devastating blow: Those who stayed behind in Pompeii and Herculaneum were killed instantly by this infernal wave of heat, estimated to have been as high as 900° Fahrenheit. The barkeep of this tavern was one of these poor souls. He didn’t make it out of the establishment in time and perished in the cot where he slept, along with a dog and a man who had taken refuge inside the tavern with them.

Honestly, I can think of worse ways (and places) to perish.

In December 2020, archaeologists at the Archaeological Park of Pompeii announced that they had found the remains of these two men and the dog as they were excavating this ancient food establishment, known as a thermopolium.

I mean, sure, everyone (I hope) knows the story of Pompeii. I think it's awesome that they're still making discoveries there. Well. Rediscoveries, technically.

As a classical archaeologist whose research centers on food and food preparation in the Roman Mediterranean, I am overjoyed by finds like these, as the information obtained from them shines a bright light on the daily lives of classes of Roman society that are poorly represented in ancient literary sources: slaves and average, working Romans.

Wait, you mean they didn't have McDonald'ses? What a horrible time to have lived. Vesuvius would have represented a sweet release.

To recreate a meal that comes close to what may have been served here, one can begin by looking at the archaeological remains found inside.

The rest of the article goes into the findings and, as a bonus, provides a recipe. Spoiler: not even pizza!

Does all of this evidence suggest that meat boiled in broth at the corner popina is the Roman version of pub grub?

No burgers, no fish & chips, no Buffalo wings (which I consider to be a bonus; those things suck), and not even French fries.

The recipe, if you're not inclined to visit the site (you should; Atlas Obscura is my third favorite website), is for braised duck. Now, I have a personal rule against eating anything smarter than I am; this includes cuttlefish, cat, and duck. I do make an exception for bacon, as it's bacon. But I try not to impose my personal preferences on anyone else.

So there you have it. You can call it Volcano Duck, maybe. Or just read the article and marvel at what we've rediscovered through the wonders of archaeology.

One-Sentence Movie Review: The Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard

This film has almost everything I look for in a movie: Samuel L. Jackson, Ryan Reynolds, Salma Hayek, other big stars, gunfights, chases, explosions, great stunt work, snappy dialogue, and marvelous dark humor; in fact, the only thing it doesn't have is anything more than a basic plot -- the lack of which barely diminished my enjoyment of the spectacle.

Rating: 4.5/5