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 |  This contains entries to Take up Your Cross, Space Blog, Blog City PF and BC of Friends |
"March 9"   ** Image ID #2113718 Unavailable ** ** Image ID #2113629 Unavailable **   T I would tend to agree with it. People whose memories go back that far ar often people with look up to with respect. We value their opinions and if we don't then we're crazy. I once thought old timers were senile too but I did know to respect them. That respect meant I listed to what they said. In doing so I picked up a lot of things. I may not have necessarily believed them when they were spoken but I remembered them later when I found them to be true. So I quit believing all seniors were senile early on and started listening to them. I fear for the next generation of gray heads though. Children any more aren't taught the kind of respect we were taught when we were younger. I'll be lucky if I myself am not cast out at the bottom of Mount Olympus by the current generation. On the other hand that shouldn't be a problem because kids nowadays often don't believe in God anyway, false or otherwise.  M Tell us about a time when something that has basically always been a detriment to you turned out to be really useful. The first thing that comes to mind for me is my history itself. Much of it was pocked with drug addiction and generally negative vibes but it all turned out to be a major blessing in disguise. Due to the things I endured I have insights that many people will never have. When I take the time to actually listen to my gut I can tell when people are lying the moment they start, not based on what they are saying but based on body language. These techniques were survival tools to me at one time and now they have become a major gift to me. I have learned endurance that never would have been possible otherwise. When I was in active addiction I survived things that would have killed many people. I survived overdoses on a daily basis day after day and year after year for decades. I am assured by both medical doctors and the corporation that makes the drug I used that the amounts I took were far beyond lethal. There are only two explanations as to my survival: tolerance and divine intervention. It really doesn't matter to me because in my mind the tolerance will always be the result of divine intervention. I do know however that simply surviving the lifestyle itself taught me much endurance and perseverance that I would not have had otherwise. I also have a deep measure of serenity today even in the face of the most drastic of situations. In fact the level of serenity I have can at times be unnerving because I lack the motivation that most people have. Most people get their motivation from a sense of insecurity. For example they get up and go to work each morning because they worry that not doing so will result in the loss of their job and thus problems for loved ones and themselves. I seldom feel that angst. On Maslow's hierarchy of needs my physical needs fall way behind and I usually find that I am motivated more by self-actualization. The many years of living as I did taught me to be content with very little. Then my recovery itself dictated being satisfied and accepting life on life's terms. So I am content even when I'm not sure where my next meal is coming from because I have found that I always eat and never do without. It may not be what I want but it's there and I accept that. There are so many other gifts that resulted from my addiction that I can't even begin to count them all. The biggest gift of all though is myself. I wouldn't be the person I am today if even one action had been changed in my past. I look at life as a mobile. Like a mobile you cannot change one part of your life without it completely affecting all other parts of your life. If I had done even one action differently at some point in my life it would have completely changed who I am today. Sure the body would have been mine but the person in the body would have been different. Some may argue that this would have been a good thing and perhaps they are right. The person I may have been could have turned out to have many qualities far surpassing the ones I possess. The point is however that I like being me. I can look at myself in the mirror and nurture and love the man looking back. To me that is the most precious gift of all.  B Yes I have a set routine that I have to follow at night, partially because I want to prevent any health problems and partially for my own personal fulfillment. The first thing I always do at night is complete my blog entries. I try to get to them as soon as the prompts are available because I love to write. If somebody offered me a choice between writing and breathing I would have to consider it for a second or two! Writing means the world to me. It wasn't until the end of December of 2016 that I began blogging. I really didn't consider blogging to be all that impressive. I felt it was just people rattling on about things they knew nothing about or things nobody cared about anyway. Then I felt the urge to try new genres of writing or genres I had only dabbled in in the past. So I tried blogging and you all voted me Blogger of the Week with my first entry. I guess you can say that in doing so you gave birth to a new blogger because it helped me realize two things: 1). blogging is the wave of the future. Serious writers need to blog and 2). blogging was still creative writing except in this case it's often a little more subjective. I live in West Virginia USA, which means that the blog prompts are posted around midnight each morning my time. I stay awake until each blog is answered and then begin the second part of my routine which is done to address my health issues. Unlike many people who have health issues I don't ignore them and hope they'll go away. I address them right away, resulting in my taking quite a few prescription medications for things like blood pressure, angina, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Bi-Polar Disorder, and other things. So I take my medication faithfully. After that I put on my C-PAP mask. C-PAP stands for Constant Positive Airway Pressure and it is a machine that helps people with sleep apnea breath consistently while sleeping. Prior to using my C-PAP I was tested and found to stop breathing in excess of 80 times per night. This is caused by the anatomy of one's throat. The C-PAP machine forces air into your lungs at a consistent pressure and keeps you breathing so you don't keep waking up to breathe. Sleep apnea is dangerous because some people who stopped breathing did not wake up and died as a result of it. Once my C-PAP machine is in place I settle back on my pillow and pray. I would love to kneel and pray but my knees prevent me from doing so. I have arthritis in both knees and will eventually needs a knee replacement in one knee. So I believe God understands why I don't kneel. Once my prayers are finished I wait for sleep to overtake me. If i find I can't sleep I will get back up and do some more writing until I get sleepy. Beds are made for two things and tossing and turning are not those two things. I find that this routine works well for me. If I go to work, where I have to get up early, then I will change my routine too compensate. For now writing is my work and the office is open when I declare it open.  |
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