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One writes to make a home for oneself, on paper, in time, in others minds. Kazin
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| "He's really not worth my time and energy anymore." - I hate those kind comments! In the real big scheme of it all, we may all seem small, but none of us are worthless. We are all, addict and non-addict, irreplaceable, special. Treated that way, it is my hope anyway, we can only help each other become what we are capable of becoming. My brother's worth is great. What is worthless is my desire to spend my time and energy on trying to control his life and his choices. On trying to control anyone's life or choices, for that matter, other then my own. After spending time working my program, I respectfully respond to my brother according to the boundaries I set in place for myself. I don't need to scold or yell or accuse my responses to him. To be honest I never did that out loud, but my thinking was often times along those lines, which of course is perceived. Now, both outwardly and inwardly, I respond out of love and respect for my brother. No matter what or where he is at. I rant not because I feel people who make statements like the above feel that their addicted loved ones are really worthless. It just brought to mind many expressed distinctions I have heard on addicts being useless, good-for-nothing, damaged goods ... The disease of addiction my brother struggles with saddens me. The sadness remains regardless of the progress I make. That it is that way is simply a fact. The change came in that it no longer holds me back. The main thing for me now is that I focus on my own growth. And as long as I keep the main thing - the main thing - then I will be okay. Feeling this way doesn't take away from my brothers worth - but it does add an importance to my own. "People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and redeemed; never throw out anyone." Audrey Hepburn |
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