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 |  The Banana Blog |
It's been quiet in the Banana Bar this past week. So, Andre, the Blog Monkey gave us all the weekend off, then rented the Banana Bar to a mysterious group, who are going to hold some sort of religious ceremony. [YOU DIDN'T KNOW!] You showed up Saturday night expecting to find friends and drunk monkeys but discovered something very different going on. All of our communications are down. We've been hacked! What's going on at the Banana Bar? We need to know what's happening. Tell us what's going on before it's too la... ... ... ... I arrived at the Banana Bar last Saturday night. I just arrived home tonight. The details are still a little fuzzy, but I need to write all this down before I collapse in bed. The police may come knocking on the door tomorrow, so I want to be able to give them a recounting of what happened. So, as I remember it, Andre called all of us patrons of the Banana Bar, us long-time friends from WDC.com, to come over to the bar on Saturday night. "We'll have fun!" he said. "I've invited a few friends over," he said. I arrived at the appointed time, 9 PM. The bar was full of monkeys, and a few from WDC.com. Everyone seemed to be having a good time. The bar was serving a special cocktail, something Andre called 'drunken monkey'. He wouldn't tell me what was in it. It tasted a little like rum and banana and perhaps monkey sweat? Well, after a few of those drinks, the rest is a bit hazy. I think I remember some monkeys jumping up on the bar. They started a raw chicken carving contest. Then they started a raw onion carving contest. Then they had a raw potato carving contest. Then those monkeys took all three of those raw ingredients and put them on sticks. Those sticks they then stuck in the floor of the bar. Then Andre started a fire under all the food and started chanting. After the fire started, then the bar started on fire. Then the floor started burning. Soon we all scurried outside. I fell to the ground, others fell on top of me. We were so drunk we fell asleep and didn't hear the fire truck. When I woke tonight, the Banana Bar was smoking still. The monkeys are gone, the others from WDC.com are gone. That's my story and I'm sticking to it. W/C 319    |
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