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Rated: 18+ · Book · Travel · #2249231
I went on a 5-day Cruise with a crazy (read: drunk) monkey!
#1010374 added May 18, 2021 at 3:56pm
Restrictions: None
Key West

Well, I don't remember all the details from the ship's departure yesterday, since Andre and I had to rush on board last minute. It's all a bit of a blur for some reason, but I remember a nice crew attendant explaining all about the breakfast routines, exercise- and other activity rooms, how the light and air conditioner in the room works, and... well there was something else but I don't remember what.


.... Oh, yes, our destination! I was a complete blank this morning, so I was excited to look out the window and see:

*Compass*Key West, Florida


Yes!!! During the night we arrived at the southernmost place in the U.S., the delightful and fascinating Key West! We must have passed both Key Largo and Islamorada on the way, so I've added 'Key Largo' and 'Bloodline' to my Netflix list. Would have been nice to see the filming locations*Video*, but this very last of the keys has turned out to be a very interesting location.

You're wondering by now how Andre has reacted to all this. Well... To my great annoyance it's turned out that we got a double room, separate beds, thankfully! So I woke up to the little so and so snoring like a freight train on the other bed. And he kept doing so throughout breakfast time. Don't judge me, guys, there was no waking him.

And so, it was a very grumpy monkey I had to bring ashore today. We were supposed to go on a sightseeing tour of the Dry Tortugas, but thanks to Andre we lost the boat*Wave2*. I was a bit annoyed, I was hoping we could do a bit of diving. Instead, we decided to go on a walk from Mallory Square, down Duval Street, and see if we could find a nice place to eat some brunch.

And whaddaya know, you guys: There's a place called the Flying Monkeys saloon here. Ahem, let me rephrase that: !!!!!!!

We spent all the morning, and well into the afternoon there. I insisted it was a bit early for drinks, so we grabbed a bite to eat at Fogarty's. But we were already checking out the drink menu. Let me mention a few of the drinks listed:

*Glass5*Flying Monkey (of course)
*Glass5*Grape Ape (Bourbon, Rum, Grape Punch)
*Glass5*Banana Breeze (Vodka, Vanilla, Ice cream and fresh bananas!!!!!*Banana**Banana**Banana*!!!)
*Glass5*Dirty Monkey (Well...)
*Glass5*Chocohol(I think I'll refrain from listing more ingredients, due to public health concerns)
*Glass5*Monkey Slush(Hmmm....)


Can you guys imagine how excited we were?! We were just going to stay here, and we had already ordered a slush for me and a Banana Breeze*Banana**Glass5* for Andre (duh), when we heard an evil cackling behind us. No, it wasn't a wicked witch, it was far worse: Rhesus monkeys. The little rascals must have gotten tired of wrecking havoc at Lois Key, and made their way to the very heart of tourism in these parts, probably hoping to bum bananas off gullible visitors. And there they were, staring at Andre the outsider with his long monkey fingers already wrapped around his deliciously cool banana drink!

We ran.

That's right, you gotta know when to cut your losses, this did not feel safe for Andre! Like the clever tourists that we are, we hid away in Hemingway's*Books2* house for a while. We were peeping out the windows, looking for the band of local monkeys, but they didn't find us. We wasted most of the time we had left there. It was too bad, really, we had some great plans. No Southernmost Point Buoy photo shoot for us; no Butterfly*Butterfly2B* and Nature Conservatory (and I really wanted to see The Birth of a Butterfly Open in new Window.!); no kayaking in the mangroves (actually, we were gonna drink that one away anyway, how else to have time for both Dirty Monkeys and Grape Apes?).

Too bad. But it did mean we had plenty of time to get to know Ernest Hemingway and the ways he had about him. In particular, we noted that his favourite drink was not the mojito, but a simple scotch and soda, and perhaps a Gibson now and then. Good ol' Papa did in fact stay away from the sweet drinks (diabetes, but that's perhaps gossipy), so even the Papa Doble would have been all wrong for him-even though it's named after him!

Anyway, we made note of some interesting cocktail recipes, and spent the rest of the time reading in a 'For Whom the Bell Tolls'-draft we found lying about.*BookOpen* Interesting stuff.

We didn't have much time left though, and again we had to run to the ship*Boat* not to miss the 4PM bell!*Bell* And so, with the bell tolling for our departure (in the nicest way possible!), we have once again made our way on board the cruise ship. Now we just have to find our way to our room, we were NOT paying attention last time.












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