Fantastic W.D.Wilcox
The house had more depth and personally than Sally, but I felt her fear. Such a fast paced, entertaining, cat and mouse flash fiction, you have a talent for this, I have not enjoyed myself so much in a long time reading flash.
Thanks no suggestions it's just too good! StaiNe
Gosh! How creative, a fly, a captive, the mystery of being caught but perhaps enjoying it, the illusions. There a lot in this small poem and me and my darkness enjoyed it and found it a little creepy. Again very creative.
Favorite:
the venom shone green on my hair
my mood was dark—too many cares
What an opening I was hooked.
Thanks!! very much even though a few years ago. My only suggestion is capitalization, or centering it.
Have a good day. StaiNe
Random Review Time, Good day, Sum1's Home Kudos!
Aging is scary and you nailed that fear very well in this poem. To think our minds carry conservationists, trick our hearts, and shudder out our soul. Any illness with age is changing and this tells of such a change. I have no suggestions and enjoyed.
Somewhat of a sad feel to this.
Thanks!
Write on, and enjoy your day. StaiNe
Quite suggestive in one has that mind set, almost a little dark and despair but not quite, a good poem full of a lot of different feelings, love, desire, regret, divine, a some darkness.
Oh LA LA!
No handkerchiefs will wave us goodbye
Thanks for sharing like I said some quite different imagery and the feelings that creates. I see no errors, just me I kind of wanted some more depth. Thanks for the share and enjoy your day.
Lucky Penny, how creative! I enjoyed this a lot. I mean you had me believing the penny was bad and it really was, but perhaps it flipped when it struck the pretty lady, perception is what this about how we look at things changes everything. Entertaining, fast paced, painful and bright. Note a big story but wow so much is happening. Thank you so much!
It always nice to come a poem that isn't expected. This is a neat subject, and holds a little mystery, a little mood, and some lighting. I enjoyed this, and wonder what Sam's secret are? Coffee and thinking. A great combo. I don't see any errors, no suggestions for change. Thank you kindly for sharing.
You tell thoughts about thinking a friend is one, and knowing after money enters that your wrong a no friend at all clearly, and I suppose this happens a lot. It a good poem that says much without any imagery or overdone feelings. Well done.
It's hard to pass up a good coat, especially when they get discontinued. I enjoyed this appreciate the note attached, made a little more sense. I see no errors and can't suggest anything helpful. Thanks!!
This is neat, not something I would expect to read about but could totally relate, as I heard stories and see the evidence of dentures and people are super happy for them and are very expensive like glasses. Creative and very well written, Thanks!
Writing can be all these things and you describe a few simply without a lot of fluff. Not too wordy and that's nice change from some classic longer poetry. IT is without limits, and only bound own imagination. They say we only use about 10% of our brains.
I can't really see any errors and I don't think there's change needed. Thanks!
This is a great poem, enjoyable and relatable.The brighter the day, the deeper the shadow cast, and this sums most of that statement up at least for me. I really enjoy the night as physiological themes. The feelings a dark night can develop. Thanks!
No suggestions I so enjoyed my time.
I'm not familiar with the poetry form, and understood what was being expressed but feel this type of poem can create pondering, for there's more to it than whats written. Well edited and I can't suggest any changes to it. Thanks!
Oh La La! Small, expressive and very angry poem. I felt it. Too often this happens, all for different reasons, and it's sad people grow apart, since loneliness is a real fear today in society.
In the moment, and well edited and enjoyable. I had anger years ago, but now no more. Sharing was wonderful and I appreciate it, It's nice to know we're not alone in out experiences. Thanks Intuey. StaiNe
A poem can be about anything and this cute one about a sock with toe holes is cute. I could see the contentment of putting on a favorite pair of socks, only to realize that they've had their day and another pair is needed. Made me smile, simple and well edited. Thanks!
I myself can't pass up a good word search and this was fun to do, took me a little longer than I'd care to admit but delightful for everyone. The Gif and image at the first are a heartwarming touch, as I have many winter wonderland memories myself and adore the warmth despite the theme.
A neat little historical like tale you tell with this poem, I enjoyed it. Very creative and clearly expressed. I could see Aegis is all his glory. The only suggestions I have is the beginning it seems to be missing the tense you keep with the rest of the poem.
You wrote:
Oh people give ear,
The tale you hear,
Of an adventure dear!
example:
Oh people do give ear,
To this tale your hear,
Of an adventurer dear!
I really did enjoy this, and I wish you luck in the contest.Thanks you kindly for sharing. StaiNe
Good Morning Anhait
Interesting, philosophical look into how one would see themselves walk, as if their life with each decision, each feeling, each remembered event was like a page in a book. It seems as if a lot of life has been written, wore shoes. Content, somewhat happy, a glimpse of sadness but I see no regrets, perhaps confusion. There's a lot expressed in this tint poem, and that's what great about poetry everyone get something different from it.
Perhaps despite it size, breaking it into three line stanzas to emphasise some of those questions and deep feeling and self reflect. Like this:
example:
What can I see, the road or my own passage?
No worn out shoes are ever strange.
A story becomes a legend on the last page.
Which winter ever paints the leaf jade?
Love is always free even in a broken heart's cage.
I do not know where I am going in my own haste.
My fingers are still touching my fence.
My worn out shoes still sketch some footprints on my life's page.
You open with each question, then give the reader a change to understand the answer a read on. Only my suggestion and I hope it helped. Thank you for sharing, again I enjoyed this a lot.
StaiNe
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Thoughts?
This is a very well thought out poetry form. I enjoyed it, and it sweet in that your memories are intense and kind. Thanks you for sharing and good use of the prompt provided.
Good day, 🌖 HuntersMoon Random Review Link found you.
This is such a powerful emotionally charged subject, I feel like it would be scary to wade these waters but this is very well done. "Don't ring" Impactful and well edited. Thank you for sharing and talking about a subject that is very much needed, I hope this helped someone.
It's often said you get back what you put into something and I think that sums up this straightforward poem. I enjoyed this, simple imagery and not over used in difficult words. Thank you for sharing.
It can be difficult to write an interesting poem with prompt words, but no here for I enjoyed this story like poem, and could see the change in direction at the end. Sweet and somewhat romantic. Well edited I have no suggestions for improvement. Thanks!
What a cute well written children poem, creative even restricted to a prompt. I enjoyed it. The rhyme, the innocence I saw. You have a wonderful talent for poetry, and this doesn't disappoint. No errors, my Thanks!
Let me say I think this is a very cute poem, such a nice change from road rage and venting stuck in traffic or such. Reminds me of my phone calls with my older sister, takes her over a hour drive to make a 15 minute walk. Thank for sharing I enjoyed it a lot.
I hope it helped you shed some of your perceptions just as the reader is to do. Helped you deal with what seems a rough hand for lack of a better word. It's sad to read and well edited I see no punctuation errors. Thank you for sharing and again I hope it helped venting.
Well written from the prompt provided. I could picture the pit, the intense anger, all the spooky, gory intent. The predator almost seems like a wild animal with intellengent thoughts.
Long but enjoyable, edited completely. Thank you for sharing. StaiNe
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