I liked the passion that oozed out of your poem! I was only confused by the last stanza. Is the narrator saying that without the person she loves she cannot overcome her demons (not identifying as gay) or is she saying that our love transcends a label or is she saying she now is loving men instead of women. Was the person she is speaking about one whom she had unrequited feelings for (a very close friend) or one she was intimate with? Maybe it is just late at night and I can't figure it out or maybe there is meant to be a bit of mystery to the poem. Either way, I enjoyed it! Feel free to look through and critique some of my poems/stories---almost every one relates to my newfound (if 2 and a half years is newfound) embrace of being a lesbian and finding love.
Somehow I am hearing JT's "Summer Love" song-I'm even humming it in my head. For me, and it might only be for me, thinking of young lovers, hand in hand, at the beach is just an overplayed story. However, if you throw in details or mix up the way the words sound or use interesting descriptors of the sand (toes touching the smooth pebbles, the playful shadows dashing on the line of the tide, etc) instead of just using the words sand and ocean. However, I loved your lines
"I really
Dearly hope
That my sunburn
Hides my blush"
That line makes this poem your own.
I enjoyed the imagery, especially the sunburn hiding the blush of your face. Clever and unique, and brings a vivid image right to my face! Maybe throw in a word or two of dialogue?
I love your rhythm, flow and use of sound. Good work! Keep it up!
I really liked the rhythm and use of color red to illustrate the abuse the speaker endured. I like the format including the repetition of the first line and then the images of crayons, paint and ink. Finally, I appreciate the last line of each stanza, representing what actually occurred versus what you wish had occurred in the second line of each stanza. Perhaps you could lengthen this out, keeping the same format. Keep writing!
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Good work! Keep it up!