Hello there. Indelibleink here. I'm reviewing your story in order to fulfill my obligations with the
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Keep in mind that I'm not a reviewing professional. Actually, I'm not a writing professional, either. Consequently, please remember that my opinions are just that - opinions, and we all have different styles and preferences when writing. So, in all likelihood, my perspective will differ - perhaps radically - from yours. So please do not feel offended if my views don't coincide with yours - this writing thing can be pretty humbling for even the best writers. With that in mind, let's proceed to the feedback:
Initial Impression (upon completion of reading this piece): Fun read. Having had dogs as a kid, I could relate with Jimmy quite easily.
What Stood Out (Favorably): As I alluded to above, I have a positive connection to this story to begin with. My dog wasn't quite as huge, but my struggles with "control" were! This being a flash fiction entry, word count and the inclusion of the prompts into the story were hurdles you had to overcome, and you did a very good job with both.
Characters I had an easy time visualizing Jimmy, the policeman, and, of course, Moose. Character definition was good
Story Well done in 00 words
Background Again, well done with the limited word count.
Dialog You maximized the dialog, again, in pretty strict parameters.
What might I suggest for improvement? Please know that any criticism(s) are offered in the spirit of one Rising Star helping another (That way, we can "flame out" together)!: None I can think of. You did a really fine job with this story.
Best advice I can give: Keep writing! That's far and away the best thing a writer can do!
I hope this may be of some benefit to you. If my review was less-than-flattering, just consider the source. At the same time, if my review was just gushing with superlatives, then it also follows that you may not need to start working on you acceptance speech for the Pulitzer just yet, either. Also, if I have succeeded in agitating to the point of retaliation, please make note of my address below, visit my port, and "let me have it." Heck, we're Rising Stars; we can take it!
Indelibleink
indelibleink@writing.com
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