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My thoughts released; a mind set free |
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These pages contain my thoughts, from meandering ideas and persuasions to deep cerebrations and serious mentations. Why, for what purpose? To release my mind and set creativity free. Somewhere inside the constraints of my mind dwells a writer, a poet, an artist who paints with words. In here I release those constraints and set the artist free. Perhaps, lost somewhere in the depths of thought, is a story or a poem, waiting to be written. 
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| It's late tonight and I should already be in bed. But, I want to get this written and then relax with my glass of wine before I turn in. It's been a long day, but a good day, even though it got so late. First of all, I didn't have to be to work until eight, so I didn't get up until six; that's sleeping in around here, since most mornings the alarm is going off at three. Also, I only had to work a half a day, four hours. Normally we do six hour shifts, except on Saturdays, which are eight hours. But, as we have hired new people, the schedule has adjusted to meet the requirements while trying to keep everyone happy with hours. So, Saturdays turned into three shifts, just like any other day. That made Sunday through Friday six hour shifts and Saturday five and a half hour shifts. Only, Sunday we start later, so it was mid afternoon by the time I got out of there. Also, Rhonda works after me, so she would be there for her six hours, then close up. Of course, it usually ended up closer to six and a half hours for her, and it would be eight thirty when she got done. Then, at least a half hour to get home, usually a little longer, which put it around nine fifteen to nine thirty by the time she got home. After unwinding a bit, and then going to bed, it would be ten or later, often closer to eleven before we were asleep. Monday was back to the alarm going off at three in the morning, so I usually only ended up with three or four hours of sleep. Then, we were able to schedule me off for Mondays, which helped, but it was still late getting home and to bed on Sunday nights. Rhonda still had to be to work by quarter to eleven, so she would leave around ten or a little after. In order to have some time before work, we would get up at six, and of course, the late night still cost us a little. Not as bad as when I worked Mondays, but it still was a hassle. So, when we hired last week, to fill the one opening, we decided to split Sundays into three four hour shifts. I work until noon, Rhonda works until four, and we are home with plenty of time to enjoy a nice dinner, relax, and be in bed in time to get a good nights sleep before the alarm goes off at three. Today was the first Sunday we implemented the new schedule, so I worked till noon, Rhonda worked till four, and then we went out for dinner. It's our twelfth anniversary of the day we met. After dinner, we did some shopping and hung out until seven thirty, then Rhonda assisted with closing. Since we are still training in the new guard, it was needed to guide him through one closing before we turn him lose on his own. So, today should be the last day we have to stay out so late on a work night. I know we will from time to time, but at least we can still relax, instead of work. It was nice to not have to work this evening, even though I stuck around to give Rhonda a ride home after closing. She didn't work, either, just walked the guy through the procedures. Now, one more early morning, then I have three days off and Rhonda has two days off. Next week we will switch it out, and I will have two while she has three. Oh, and it's both of us off together. It's been a long time since we both had the same days off together, and we are looking forward to it. Well, I'm writing in 750 words and I'm getting close to my mark, which is 750 words or more. That means I'm almost done and can enjoy a little ice cream, finish my glass of wine and then turn in. Tomorrow I know I'll be tired since I'm going to be running behind on sleep, but I will get done at eleven and can take a nap if I want. Then, I'll go pick Rhonda up at five and then -- two days off together, and one more by myself. Three days off in a row! Sometimes I had to work months to get three days off in total, and never in a row. Well except for once in November when I took a day off with my two. But that was about the end of us having the same days off. Now I'm just rambling, indicating I'm beyond tired. Goodnight. |
| Not so early today, in fact, it's actually getting to be quite late. Of course, that's my normal time -- late. I should have done this earlier, but just didn't get in here right away, and when I did, I was so tired I couldn't keep my eyes focused. I thought about writing my journal then, but knowing I would only increase in tiredness, I opted to do a little reading and put off writing until later. I also thought about editing a poem I uploaded, just a few little things I wanted to do with it before it goes public, but again, too tired. So, I read some newbies, but didn't get much done in there, either. I went through my mail and cleaned out a bunch of old items, read some things, and then got ready to go pick up Rhonda. About that time, my brother called, so I talked to him for a little bit, then left. After we got back home, I again logged in and read a couple of things I wanted to finish from earlier. One was a great little poem, a very erotic and passionate little poem. I should have shared the link, but since I'm not writing this in Writing dot Com, but in 750 Words, I can't without going through a bunch of jumping around. I can give the name of the poem, "Please, Please Me" and hopefully you can find it with a search if your interested. It wasn't a very long poem, not a rhyming type poem, and it's actually quite innocent in it's wording. But the meaning is clear, colorful, and heated things up by the end of it. It builds naturally, flows well, and I found it stirring both emotions and thought. Anyway, I read it, liked it, and was able to do a pretty good review of it. It helped that it was well written and did not require any in depth thought on how to correct or what my improve things. It was just the opposite, well structured, good mechanics, no errors that I noticed, and just an easy review. I mean, when something is done right, and well, what's to say except it's done right and well. There is one more thing to say, how you perceived the item, how it invoked thought and triggered emotions; how well it was enjoyed. So that's just what I did. It felt good, too. Not the poem, although the feelings it instilled did feel good. Even so, I'm speaking of how it felt to do a review. It's been quite a while since I got one written, and it felt damn good to write another. Hopefully I get enough time soon that I can get back to doing a few reviews a week. I had at one time wanted to try and do at least one review a day, but that is not always going to be possible with my job. But, a few a week, two or three, should be possible. Anyway, that's what I did after getting back home, then it was time for dinner, after which was time to trim up my goat-hairs. Say what? Goat-hairs? Yes, you read that correct, goat-hairs. Although the term was originally used to describe my goatee and mustache, it now has morphed into a generic term for any and all facial hair. Let me explain... Quite some years back, I decided I wanted some change. I didn't know at that time just how much change I was in for, but that's a whole book, and we are just discussing one chapter. Or perhaps that is a whole series and we are only talking about one short story. What ever way you want to look at it is fine. We are discussing goat-hairs. My daughter was just beginning high school, and I was in a marriage that was disintegrating rapidly. I was also just starting my college education, while in my thirties. I needed some change, and one safe and easy change was my personal appearance. I had let my beard grow out in the winter a few times, I had sported a mustache most of my adult years, but I had never done anything with sideburns. So, I decided I would see how they looked. I let my facial hair grow out a bit, then set to trimming me up a nice pair of Elvis style sideburns. I thought I would start out with those big full sideburns, since it would be easy to trim them down, whereas if I started out with small sideburns, I would have to wait for my whiskers to grow out before I could increase size. The big sideburns didn't do anything for me, so I trimmed a bit and looked myself over. Nope, not really moving me yet. Again I took some off and checked my look in the mirror. It was easy to see, I was not side burn material. They just did not look natural on my face. So, that was settled, and in a few seconds, one was gone, then a few more and the second was gone. This whole time had been spent looking and assessing side burns, but I had not really looked past them. See, when I started out, I had a weeks growth over my entire face, a full beard; short but full. When I cut the wide side burns into my cheeks, I drew an imaginary line where the hair needed to be removed, and with a nice swipe of the razor, bare skin surfaced. Next was the bottom, along the jaw, and down. Now, I repeated this on each cheek and each side of my neck, resulting in a dark furry strip right down the center of my neck. It was very distracting, so I removed the hair from the center, but not all the way up to the chin. As the side burns dwindled to nothing, more and more cheek showed, my neck showed, but my mustache and chin hairs had not yet been touched. I had intended to remove the chin hairs, but was going to leave the mustache. I just didn't know if I wanted it to end at the corners of my mouth, or extend past them. I may have even decided to run the ends down beside my mouth. It all depended on how the side burns looked, and what went best with them. Only now they were gone and what I seen in the mirror was a goatee. Not only did I see it, but I liked it. So, the goatee stayed. My wife at that time didn't like it, and since the relationship was self destructing anyway, I was even more determined to keep it. My daughter was telling a friend that I had grown a goatee, but instead it care out, "Guess what? My dad grew goat-hairs." Of course the friend had no idea, but soon seen what I had actually grown. Even so, the term stuck and I liked it. From that point on, I had goat-hairs, instead of a goatee. Over the next month, I received many compliments on my choice of wearing a goatee, which made me both feel good, and more determined to not shave this off. I have a couple of times over the years, but never for very long. Once was for a job, it was required because I was working around foodstuffs, the few other times was just to trim it down and let it grow back out; I get very bushy over time. This winter, working a lot outside and having very cold temperatures, I decided to grow my beard out again. Not long, about an inch is all, and just to protect my face from the bitter cold and the almost daily wind chills. It helps more than most people think, but I didn't feel comfortable with it. I asked my wife what she thought of it, and her answer was not very positive. She wasn't negative, she just stated that she did not care for full beards, even short ones. I knew she liked the goatee, so tonight I trimmed it back down and that is the story on goat-hairs. Of course, after trimming that fuzzy hair, I needed a shower, and Rhonda wanted to take one as well, so we decided to conserve water and energy and take one together. She was enjoying the full feel of my lips now that the goat-hairs were trimmed up, and I was still feeling the emotional response to the poem I had read. This lead to a lot of hanky-panky in the shower, and taking much longer than normal. This is why I'm late getting in here, and why I'm going to end this now, and get back to the hanky-panky~ |
| I managed to get in here earlier today, and it feels good to be back on time. Even so, I'm beat and really need some down time. Soon, but not yet. I won't have a day off until Tuesday; I did get Monday and Tuesday off but now it won't start until Tuesday and that's going to make it even more difficult. Of course, the last two weeks have been very tiring ad very trying anyway. For one thing, I haven't been getting my two days off. I've worked both Mondays for the last two weeks. The first Monday, two weeks back, was a double shift do to the weather, and this last Monday I was off but had to do an interview and a bunch of paperwork. It's amazing how fast and easy it is to fall behind on getting enough sleep, and how slow and difficult it is to get caught back up. I no more than start getting enough sleep and then something comes up and I'm behind again. Two weeks back it was weather, and try as I might, I just could not get caught back up. This week it was better, just having to do a bunch of work on my first day off, but I could have used time that to get some much needed rest, too. Even though I had Tuesday off, it was not enough to really get rested up. Then, on Wednesday, we started training a new guard, and I've been going steady from morning until night since. In fact, I won't get home today until around six, and have to be back up at three tomorrow morning again. At lest tomorrow won't be such a long day, like the last three have been. Sunday will also be better, since I will only be working a short shift. But, it's also the twelfth anniversary of the day my wife and I met, so I will be sticking around after work until she gets done so we can go out for dinner. After dinner, we will have to stick around until the night guard closes, since one of us will have to walk him through the procedure. That means either Rhonda or I will have to go in to work for about an hour and the other will have to wait around until they are done. That also means it will be after nine at night when we get home and I have to be back in at five in the morning. As you can see, not much time left for resting up. It's been that kind of a week, winter, and year. In fact, it's been a year since things really went better. But, hopefully, with this new guard trained, we will have a full crew and they will all stick around for a while. That means a little more time for me, and time off with my wife, which we have had very little of over the last year. Unfortunately, in another month, we will start having to provide some double coverage. That means I will soon have to put in more hours again, and by May I'll have to be looking for a part-time person to fill in some hours again. If things work well, that will not be a problem, just some extra work for a week, then back to enjoying my time off again. But, getting someone hired and trained never goes the way it should. Even so, we will stay hopeful. Today is another long day for me, even though I was done working at one-thirty this afternoon. After work I had to send a fax to the corporate office, and call my boss. I got his answering service, but he called back and by two I was done with work for the day. Wait, I have some things I should be doing, but I may just put them off for a few days. Either way, I have to wait for Rhonda to get done, and that's two and half hours away yet. It's these long days that really burn me out. I can handle them for a while, but they do take a lot out of a person. Especially when a lot of the time is waiting around. It wouldn't be so bad if I got paid for this time, but I don't, and find myself longing to be home, taking my boots off, changing out of my uniform, and putting my feet up. Soon, but not yet. Hopefully by next week I will be able to do just that, as well as to get caught up on things I need to do at home, and maybe even get some time to join my brother for some fishing~ |
| It done went and got late on me again. Not terribly bad, but later than I had intended. Not that I didn't try, it just did not work out the way it was planned to. See, around six my time, we took the dogs out for a potty break. We played a little, and around quarter after got ready to head back in. Before we could, however, we needed to plug the vehicle in. No, not an electric vehicle that needs charging, it's a GMC Jimmy that needs to start in the morning, and its just very cold out again. With sub-zero temperatures, vehicles just don't always start the best, and it's very hard on them. So, they have heaters that can help keep the engine warmer in these kind of temperatures. Anyway, back to plugging the vehicle in. We also needed to check the radiator coolant to make sure it was full, since it's losing some but we cannot find where. It's not a fast leak, but it's enough to bring the level down every couple of days, depending on how much we drive it. Lately, it's been quite a bit for miles on it, and I wanted to make sure it was ready to go. I have to be up at three in the morning, and it's going to be cold and windy again. Therefore, it's much better to get things ready this evening instead of in the morning. I topped off the radiator, and was just about to put the cap back on when it just pops right out of my hand. I had gloves on since it's very cold out, and they were slippery enough that the cap slid right out of my grip. Of course, it dropped down and kind of hung up on some of the tubing and cables right in that area. So I slip my coat off so I won't get it all dirty, then reach down with my bare hand and grab a hold of the cap. I can't hardly reach it, and as I close my finger tips down on the cap, I feel it slipping from my fingers. I try for a better grip, but it was too late. The cap slipped out of my fingers, and lands further down, and under the battery box. I tried a couple different ideas to reach it, but there just wasn't any way to get to it. I had to come back inside and put on an old coat, since it's about twenty below wind chill out tonight, and almost a negative five degrees without the wind. I ended up having to remove the battery and then Rhonda tried to reach it, but could not get her arm down far enough. Meanwhile I'm holding the battery as far out of the way as possible without undoing the cables. Even so, she still brushed up tight against it. This is when I realize she is wearing her security coat, and the sleeve is rubbing against the battery. Hopefully she did not get any battery acid on it, but it's always very difficult to tell. it's a new battery and it's clean enough, but that does not mean she did not get acid on her sleeve. I had her go in and get it off, telling her to put it right in the washer. Only she didn't put it in the washer, she just changed coats and came back out to help me. While she was inside changing coats, I managed to push my arm down along the battery and felt the cap in my fingertips. I had to wedge my arm down a bit more, so I again removed my coat and pushed my exposed arm down and managed to get hold of the cap and bring it back up. I then put my coat back on, being half froze by now. From there it was wrestle with the battery and get it back into place, then fasten it down. Only it did not want to go right back into place. It would go in just about all the way, but not enough to get the clamp that holds it down, in place. I had to loosen that even more, fearing that it may also fall. Then, I had to lift the battery back up, maneuver the clamping piece and lower the battery back down while holding everything in place. One slip and I would have had some pretty sore fingers, since the battery would have landed on them, but I managed to get it all back into place, get the clamp back down, and tightened. Then it was back in, wash up and get Rhonda's coat in the wash. Hopefully it's not going to have holes in it from contacting the battery. About this time, we hear a dog barking. I thought it sounded like Hanna, but she came in with us. Only, it was Hanna, she had slipped back out while we carried the tools in. Being so cold, she could have easily frozen her toes, even her feet and ears if she had been out very long, but she didn't run off, and barked to let me know she wanted in. I'm sure glad I don't try and break dogs from barking and she let me know she needed in. She wasn't out long; not nearly long enough to suffer anything other than feeling a bit upset for being outside with anyone with her. She was very excited when Rhonda let her back in. I was just as excited to see her and see she was safe and sound. |
| Well, I was doing real good, but tonight it's kind of late again. Not real late, but going on bedtime here. Of course that's not so late, since bedtime is eight to eight-thirty. I know pretty early to bed, but then how does that saying go? "Early to bed, early to rise makes a man feel healthy, wealthy, and wise." That's one my grandma used to say all the time. The other was, "Rise and shine, it's a beautiful day in Chicago." I never quite understood that the idea was behind this one. Another one she used was, "The early bird gets the worm." She didn't say this very often, and being little, I didn't really give it much thought. My older brother must have given it a lot of thought, since he was damn near impossible to get out of bed before noon. He must have thought this out and decided he didn't want worms, so he was staying in bed until the early birds had them all. I read a poem that I know grandma would have enjoyed, and probably said all the time. It's short and simple, yet hits the spot quite well. I won't bother putting it into format, and I don't recall who wrote it. It goes like this, "Get up, get up, you lazy head, Get up you lazy sinner, We need those sheets for table cloths, It's nearly time for dinner." I guess the reason I don't recall who wrote this is because it's anonymous. Yep grandma would have loved that one, and she would have loved seeing me off to bed this early. I never have been one to go off to bed very early, even though I like getting up early. In my youth, it wasn't any problem to stay up and watch the late show with my sister and dad, then go to bed and be up by six or seven. As a teen, I still was up early, around seven at the latest, but it was a task to get up for school. Then in the service, I got a taste for working nights. I had a wonderful shift, three in the afternoon to eleven, or twelve, or even as late as three in the morning, depending on what was going on. Most times not a lot at night, and we would be out of there by nine if there wasn't any brass around. If there was, it would be around ten or eleven, after they had left. Of course, there were plenty of nights there was stuff going on, and then it would be one, two, or three in the morning. Sometimes, we would get switched over to seven at night till seven in the morning for exercises and special tasks. By the time I got out, I was no longer one to get up early. I would be just getting my second wind around nine or ten at night. Of course, most of the jobs I had required me to be up early, so I developed a habit of being up late and getting up early. It wasn't too early, around five, and I could handle that. Now it's three and I'm not a strutting rooster anymore. So now, I'm re-adjusting my body clock to sleep earlier and get up earlier. I'm also re-adjusting my psych to think like my grandma, "Early to bed, early to rise ...." It's true, a person does feel much better if you get up and enjoy the full day. I get so much more done, too. Well, if I have my sleep that is. See that's the problem right now, I'm up early, there's no choice. But I'm up late at night, too. Sure, there is a choice, but old habits die hard, and how do you make yourself go to sleep when your body says it's time to go? I know the answer, by getting up early, and not taking naps. See I also was never much for naps, but I have started that habit, too. Now, though, I'm doing better at staying up and then being tired enough at night to fall asleep. Only, sometimes someone will call late and get my stressed, or things will come up with work and I'm pulling a double shift on my day off. This usually occurs after I have been up late for work the night before, so I'm going on little sleep, working a long day, and by the time I get home, I'm beat. I take a little nap, but end up sleeping longer than I want, and then it's right back into the old habit again. This time I've been fighting it, and so far I'm doing pretty good. That's why I'm logging out and going to bed, even though it's only eight o'clock here. |
| This is kind of different, writing my journal in MS Word. I have been writing in 750 Words lately, then copying it over to Writing dot Com, but today I’m writing in Word and will copy it over to my journal. I plan on still writing in 750 Words, as well, but we will see how time progresses for me. Why the change today? Because my internet provider, ITC, sucks. That’s the simple truth. See, I have only one internet provider where I live, and it’s through my phone company. So, there is no competition for them in most areas they cover, and that means they can charge higher prices for inferior service, and that is just what they are doing. When I first signed up for internet through them, I lived in a different town, but was still in the same area code. Back then, it was dial-up, and it was typical for dial-up service. Then, they started to offer a high speed service, still through the phone line. I had to get a modem that connected to the phone line and to the Ethernet port on the computer. We also had to install a filter, or we could not hear anything over the phone while connected to the internet. This worked fine, was much faster, and I had no complaints. When we moved over here, we kept the same phone number, but dropped the high speed for dial-up again. Of course, after having high speed, we really couldn’t take the slowness. Soon enough we upgraded back to high speed. Now, however, there were two choices, regular high speed, and the faster, higher speed. We stayed with the high speed we had used before, and it was great. Then, they installed fiber-optics into town, and we thought the speed would get even better. Instead, they offered three packages. They no longer offered dial-up, but had a lower speed, middle speed, and higher speed package. When they announced this, they told us that our current speed, the lowest of the three would increase, or we could go even faster if we desired. Of course, we were happy with our current package, it was affordable and fast enough for everything we did. With the land-line, we paid about sixty bucks for everything. We did not have long distance, so this was for local service and our internet. Since then, the cost for the phone has increased to about thirty eight bucks, and our total bill is now close to ninety dollars for the two. Even as the cost went up, the speed and quality dropped. Using an online speed test our provider has a link to, I have watched as our speed has almost dropped to half of what it was. So much for our current package speeding up as they said. Also, it cuts out quite often, at least a couple of times a day. At the same time, they have been aggressively advertising the higher speed packages, and slowly increasing the cost for the lower speed package. Right now, I pay almost twice as much for half the speed, and it’s unreliable at that. I purchased a netbook with Windows 8 in November and was able to download apps and programs no problem, now, I have too slow of an internet connection to download apps from home. Our Netflix takes forever to load anymore, and it only seems to be getting worse. Of course, I will have to contact them, but I have held off because I know it will cost me more money and I can’t afford more right now. See, I suspect that when I call, they will tell me it’s because I need the higher speed package for my current needs. Not that they have changed any, but that’s the answer they will give. When I ask about the interruptions in service, it will be the result of so many people on the slower speed, and when I upgrade, it won’t cut out anymore. Of course, this will solve the problems for a while, but in six months to a year, it will be just as bad and they will tell me I need to upgrade again, to the most expensive package. They are a greedy cooperative, and they have changed a lot since I first joined in 2002. We used to get back dividends yearly, now we seldom see anything back. They continue to inform us of buying out other services and how it will benefit us and keep our costs down, only to see service become worse, and cost more. The only option I have, is to pay a lot more to have service through a wireless provider, or to pay double to get satellite internet. In checking the cost, I see it’s reasonable in some areas, but we are in a bad spot and only have a few options for coverage, and then the price increases with the limitations. Also, we are in an area that does not get very good cell phone coverage, so using a cell phone provider for internet is not the best choice. Like I said, they have us over a rock because of where we live, and until someone can provide competitive service, the cost will remain high. Well, it’s time to see if I dare log online and paste this into my journal. I fear it will interrupt my download on my netbook, but I can’t wait all night. We will see |
| So far this is working out pretty good. Writing in 750 words for my journal, I mean. I write them out here, then copy and paste into WdC and have my journal updated and get to see how I progress here as well. Not that I couldn't just write in my journal directly, it's the challenge I suppose, and how this site works. I'm doing good again today, in here writing by mid afternoon. It's nice to have it done early, since so much seems to come up and mess with a persons plans. Even so, it seems I seldom get in here to write until it's time to shut down for the night and get to sleep. Today is the earliest I've been in here in a long, long time. It's nice, and I'm hoping this will get to be the normal way it goes instead of the exception. Even though I'm in early today, it's not a real good thing in every way. It's good to have my writing done early, but it's the circumstances that are not the best. See, today is Monday, and right now, I have Monday and Tuesday off, kind of my weekend. Only, today I'm up and working right away. Not in to work, like last week, but working from home this morning, then into town for an interview. The interview went well, and I ended up hiring the person right away. But, that means a lot more paperwork, schedule changes, training coordination, and time. So, I was up abut eight-thirty, worked from home until ten, then came into town and did an interview at eleven-thirty, and then worked on paperwork, scheduling, and training most of the afternoon. It would have been kind of pointless to drive back home, so I'm working on my netbook, at a local WiFi. I did get most of it done, but I don't have the information I need to do my reports yet, and will have to wrap things up tonight or tomorrow. Then again, I may just wait till Wednesday and do the rest, so I can at least get one day off without doing something for work. After I did as much as I could for work from here, I checked out my email and facebook, then came over here to get some time in on WdC. I went through messages and stuff, then logged into 750 words, which is where I am right now. Once I get this written, I'll copy and paste it into my journal, then I have to go get some dog food and spend some time with them. They have been kind of neglected lately, since I have been putting in so many hours again. That's why I let them ride along in today. But, they are spending most of their day waiting in the Jimmy, even though I go out to check on them frequently and make sure they get out to stretch, relieve their bladders, and get water. I also make sure it's staying warm for them, since it's kind of cold again today. I will also get the some special food since they are being so well behaved. Not so cold! Listen to me. It's not so nice out at all. We currently are at 12 degrees, with 10 to 15 miles per hour winds, and overcast skies. That's not very nice by any means, yet I just said it was pretty nice out. That's because we have been having a lot of days that barely get above zero degrees, and if it does, it's single digits. Also, the wind has been terrible, often blowing at 20 to 35 miles per hour and gusting as high as 60 miles per hour. Of course, some days it's warmer, if you can call less than freezing temperatures warm, but then it snows and blows hard enough to put us into blizzard conditions. After, we are back into the deep freeze again. We maybe got one nice day a week, more often every two weeks. So, that makes today a pretty nice day. Well, it's about time to go get some dog food, feed them and let them out again. Then, in another hour, Rhonda gets done with work, and we can go grab a bite to eat and go home. I still get tomorrow off, the back to work on Wednesday. We will begin training our new hire then as well, so I will have to stay later on Wednesday again, as well as Thursday. Friday I should be good to go home at my scheduled time, and from there, it's looking pretty good. If training goes well, I may be up for three days off next week, and a few less hours at work. That means I can start to get caught up with stuff at home, and spend more time in Writing dot Com. You may not be able to tell, but I'm keeping my fingers crossed this time it all works out~ |
| I'm in here earlier than normal, and it feels nice to have some time to write for a change. It also feels nice to be awake instead of half asleep. What a difference a full nights sleep makes. I'm still tired, but not exhausted like most of the week was. I made it to bed around nine last night and set the alarm for five this morning. I didn't get up right away, but instead enjoyed a couple of rounds on the snooze button. I didn't go back to sleep, just snuggled up to Rhonda until the alarm went off again. Actually, I did this a few times. It was kind of nice to get to stay in bed a little longer and snuggle, instead of having to get right up and get ready to start the day. It also felt good to get a good nights sleep. I did wake up a couple of times but was able to fall right back to sleep. I also had a full eight hours of sleep; I don't remember the last time I had more than six. A lot of nights it's been five, some three or less. I felt good all day, and even though I'm still feeling kind of tired, it's not like it's been most of last week. I not only was tired from lack of sleep, but from a lot of stress at work as well as some problems at home that need my attention. I'm off work tomorrow and Tuesday, unless something comes up. Even so, I have to do some work from home, and I also have to go do an interview. Hopefully this one works out and we get someone hired. If it does work out, we can start training on Wednesday. Getting the training done this week yet is great, but at the same time, Rhonda should be doing the training and Wednesday and Thursday are her days off. Somehow we will have to work around this and get the training done while we can. Of course, it all depends on the interview tomorrow, and if the person sticks it out and takes the job if it's offered. The last two didn't, and that was a real pain in my ass. I don't get paid while off the job site, and can't do interviews or hire paperwork while working. That means a couple of hours at least to get this all done. I try and make sure everything is good before doing the paperwork, since it's the most time consuming, but it doesn't always work out. The one guy was all ready to go, but I needed some information he did not have. he was going to email me the information I needed, but never did. I emailed him but he did not reply -- in fact, I never heard anything more from him. The next person was good to go, too. He was eager to get started and we completed all his paperwork, coordinated training and had everything set to go on Monday. Sunday he calls and informs me he is taking a different job, but wants me to hold on to everything just in case it doesn't work out. Yeah, right! Not only did he waste about three hours of my time, but who wants to hire someone who would rather take a different job, but if it doesn't work out, well than I'll work for you. Nope, not going to happen. This time around, I'm thinking of doing the paperwork right before he starts his training. I'll be done work at eleven, and can meet him about eleven-thirty. We can work on paperwork for an hour or so and get it done, then start him training. That way, I'll know he's serious and ready to go. Now, it's just a matter of doing the interview and seeing if we can progress any further. If yes, Rhonda and I will have to get the training schedule worked out, then coordinate it with the store manager. Then, train this week, and have him working by next week. We should be sitting pretty good then until about May, when we need to get another person hired for a summer position. This one is a temporary position, and limited hours, but we should be able to do pretty good with it. We have some time and who knows, by fall they may have an opportunity to stay on if they did well. For now, it's enough to focus on getting the other position filled. |
| It's bed time for me, but I want to get my entry done first. Not late, but just coming up on it, so I'm doing good. I don't have to be up so damn early tomorrow, just up at five, so if I get to bed by nine, I'll have eight hours. Of course, I don't know what to do with eight hours, and may wake up sooner, but the plan is for a nice eight hours of sleep, then get up at five and be to work by eight. Lots of time for me in the morning, then six hours at work and then home again. I have Monday and Tuesday off, and it will be nice to start them off rested and caught up on sleep instead of being exhausted and running behind. Of course, I do have to go in on Monday for an interview, but that won't be so bad, and if we get another person hired, it will be nice and easy at work again. I've been exhausted all week, starting with my full day in on Sunday, in a blizzard. I didn't work all day, just half a day, but had to hang out for the other half to give Rhonda a ride home. From start to finish it was an eighteen hour day, and something about cold and blizzards really takes a person down, especially working and driving in them. Monday was better, still bitter cold and windy, with wind chill advisories for us near sixty degrees below zero in the morning and warming up to a balmy forty below zero at the peak of the day. The wind was still blowing snow around, but not as bad as the day before, and there was no new snow falling. Even so, the roads were very bad and I could not see bringing too many people in for work, especially those who lived out of town. So I did the twenty five mile drive into work, pulled a twelve hour day, then dragged my tired carcass back home. I did get Tuesday off from work, but had lots to do from home, then Wednesday it was back to normal. Only for me, it was anything but normal, since it was cold, snowing and blowing and I did not know if I would be stuck at work again all day or not. It did clear off and get better, and I did get to come home, but just the stress was enough to wear me out. Only, I was already wore out from the start of the week.Thursday and Friday went alright, but I was so tired I just wanted to sleep all the time after work. There was still some stress with people wanting time off, and being short on help. Today I managed through, took a nice nap, and didn't get much of anything done again. By eight this evening I was ready for bed, but wanted to get this done first. I also had to take the dogs out one last time, so I did that, then settled in here with my laptop and started writing. As soon as I finish, I'll copy and paste this into my journal in Writing dot Com and then it's time to shut it all down and hit the sack. I sure hope this interview goes well on Monday, and I have a ton of stuff I need to get done tomorrow. But I should be about caught up on sleep, and with Monday and Tuesday off, except the interview, I will be doing good. If this person works out and we hire him, it will relieve a lot of stress and that will help a lot, too. So, here's to the new guy, thinking positive of course. I have to, after the last two bombed on me. I did interviews, and everything was good. They wanted the position, they were eager to start, and I went through a mountain of paperwork to get them ready to start training. The first fellow did not have his application complete, so I had him email me the information I needed. I didn't get anything, so I emailed him and reminded him I needed the information so we could get him started. Nothing again. I figure if I have to hold his hand to get him started, I don't want him on my crew; he will just be a problem later. The next guy also did great at the interview, and soon he was hired, paperwork filled out and set to start training on Monday. This was on Friday, but Sunday he called and told me he was taking a different job, and we bombed again. So this is attempt three at getting someone hired. I know his dad, and he should be pretty good, so I have good vibrations from the start. Now, if we can just get him started training and on the crew. |
| It's late tonight, so I don't have a lot of time to write. I have to be up at three in the morning again, so I should be in bed already. But, I slept away most of the afternoon, then had to go pick up Rhonda after she was done work. We did a little shopping and grabbed a bite to eat, the came home. I happen to remember I needed to download my e-music before it rolls over, since credits do not carry forward, and now I'm in here. I did take a nice nap this afternoon, after I got home form work. I've been completely wore out this week, after putting in two long days right at the start of the week. Sunday was my last day to work before getting two off, but it was a long day do to a blizzard. Also, do to the same storm, I had to work Monday instead of getting it off. That was bad enough, but I also had to pull a double shift. Since the storm would make driving slow, I was off by four int he morning and did not get home until six that night. I did get Tuesday off, but was up with Rhonda at eight. I don't know why she woke me, but she did. Then it was back to work on Wednesday, so only the one day off, and that was a very trying day. So, I've been running on nothing most of the week. See, it was so bad driving home Sunday night that it took over an hour to make twenty five miles. I didn't get to bed until just after midnight, and was up at three. Monday night run later than I wanted, and I was not able to get to bed until about nine thirty, and then up at eight on Tuesday. Just not enough sleep. So, today I had Rhonda come in early -- to prevent me from going into overtime, and after I got home I settled in for a nap. Knowing I was very tired and in need of some very restful sleep, I set the alarm just in case I didn't wake in time to go pick Rhonda up. See, on top of not getting enough sleep, I haven't been sleeping very sound, either. Possibly from being so tired, and from stress. So today, I snuggle in and closed my eyes, but sleep did not want to come. I got back up and snacked on a tangelo and then had a night cap, a small glass of sweet brandy to sooth my nerves and assist me in dropping off to sleep. It worked great, and I was soon lost in a dream. Or, was it a nightmare. Not being night, I suppose it was just a bad dream. I was at work, and trying to get into the guardhouse, but I couldn't grip the handle on the door. I tried knocking, but there was no sound as I rapped on the door. I could see the person inside, and tried waving my arms, but they looked right past me. Eventually they came out and I slipped in while the door was open, but when I tried to handle any of the equipment, I could not get a hold of it. I couldn't understand why the current guard returned to the guardhouse, since I was suppose to be working, but since I couldn't do anything, I left while the door was open. I went across the yard to the back door of the store, and had to wait till a guest came out before I could slip in, again unable to grip the handle. Once inside, I seen Rhonda talking to the managers, so I went over and talked to her, but she didn't seem to hear me or even notice me. None of them did. I followed Rhonda out and climbed in the vehicle when she opened the door. We drove across town and I continued to try and talk to her but she did not even know I was there. She was crying and so very sad, but I could do nothing for her. She stopped out in front of a funeral home and I again followed her in. There, inside were the people I work for, and they offered her comfort and together they went into the other room. I followed and walked up to the casket on display, and looking inside I was looking down at myself. Even as the reality of my death began to sink in, I heard my boss comment how I had not told anyone I was sick, and kept right on working, until I died on the site. They turned and walked to the front room, and as I tried to follow, I felt myself fading into a fog. When it cleared, I was at work again, trying to get out of the guardhouse, but even when I did, I could not get far before I was again walking into the fog. When I came out I was again in the guardhouse; trapped for eternity at work! |
| I'm writing in 750 words again tonight, only because it's kind of a nice blank page to write on with no distractions and I kind of like to see the stats after I get done. Who knows, when I get more time, I may just start using this site for my journal writing again every day. Of course, I would still be copying and pasting the entry over to WdC and keeping it open for others to read. Not that I often have much to write that anyone really would care to read, but on occasion I do write something and get comments from readers. Speaking of comments, I need to do some reading in WdC, in some journals and just random items. I enjoy reading some of the journals and need to start leaving some comments there, and I enjoy reading and reviewing other members, too. I did read a few items today, but being so tired and run down, I just did not have clear enough thinking to write a good review. I put a lot of thought into my reviews, trying to be honest, helpful, and positive. I want the person to feel good after reading my reviews, even if the item has a lot of areas that need corrections and change. It's like the old saying goes, "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all." Sure, it's great to edit through and find errors that need fixing, but that's kind of superficial if that's all the review gives; at least that's my opinion. I think a review should give insight into the item itself, is it good or not. Not subject wise, we all have different tastes, and not how well the composition is, since we all have our own way of doing things. Of course, if the subject is lost or out of context, it should be pointed out, and there are certain rules to composing an item that must be followed, or it would never be understandable. These are just a part of editing, fixing mechanical and structural areas. But what I think is even more important, is the item itself, what has been poured out into it. Is it something that provokes thought or emotion, does it captivate and set one's mind along a course of thought? Is it something that reflects on the effort the author put into it? Yes, mechanics are important, as is structure and form, but they don't mean anything if there is not content and imagery. I try and hold a positive attitude throughout a review, so that it will reflect back to the author. I feel this is most important, so the person will feel positive about what they have shared and any changes suggested. With the exception of mechanical errors, I believe a review should be just that, a positive suggestion for improving. The bottom line is, a review should leave the author feeling good. Of course, some people just cannot handle criticism at all, even good positive feedback. This is no reflection of the person giving a good review, or the review given. Some people post their work only to hear praise and requests for more of the wonderful work they shared. Often, the work is not anything good at all, since this line of thought destroys the ability to learn and advance, which is sad. Some of the items they share are good, and they could do so much more if they could just learn a little humility. All in all, I believe most people do take the reviews well and appreciate the opinions, thoughts, and suggestions that are shared with them. As you can see, I digress. I was speaking of what I need to do, and the next thing I know, I'm giving a full dissertation on my reviewing. This is what happens when one is exhausted and in need of sleep and relaxation. I desperately need to get a full nights sleep, uninterrupted and sound. I also need to get rid of some stress and get some time to relax and let go. Work, work, and more work, that's what the problem is. I just do not get a break from work, and that will have to change. But, first I must get another person hired, then perhaps revamp the schedule and reduce my hours a bit, so I can do the one thing that relaxes me most -- write. Maybe, I can even have time to do more, like get out and fish a little, read, and play some games. Now, all I need is a good worker, who is willing to do the whole job. |
| I'm writing this entry in a different site, one called 750 Words. The name says it all, it's just a blank page for a person to write out 750 words a day, as a way of zapping their creativity into high gear. I could explain it better, but they do the best job and if your curious, just jump over to the site, 750 Words at 750words.com and look around. I did this for a while, but when things at work started to take up all my time, it was kind of difficult to get this many words written. Even now, I know I will not meet that goal, and will not be able to get in here every day. See, I enjoyed this, it was a great way to brush up on my typing, get things off my mind, and to generate ideas. But, with limited time, it was a choice between here and Writing dot Com, and of course, Writing dot Com won. Even though I have not used the site for months, possibly a year -- it could be over that if I took the time to figure it up -- I still get reminders in my e-mail and have not closed anything out, since I would enjoy the challenge if I ever get enough time again. I will be optimistic and say, "When I get the time." For now, I will pop over here from time to time to write my journal entry, then copy and paste it into my journal in Writing dot Com. That way I can kind of get a little of both sites. It will limit me to just making an entry here from time to time, and I will not meet the requirements needed to get badges and points, but like I said, that was just the fluff, and I enjoy the rest even more. It's been forever since I was in here. I used to log in via my Google account, but that page doesn't even load anymore; I had to use my email and get a password sent to me. I'll have to look around and see what else has changed in here. First, however I will get this journal entry written out and then copied and pasted into my journal at Writing dot Com. Did I mention that what you write here, at 750 words is private? No, well it is, and that can be a nice thing, sometimes. Like when your having one of those disagreeable times with someone and want to blow off some steam, but don't want it anyplace they will come across it and make it into a big deal, possible reigniting the infernal you wrote to try and end. You know what I mean. Anyway, it was a rough day for me, again. Sunday really drained me, Monday, working a double shift with less than three hours of sleep almost done me in, and then I had to stand firm and push to get Tuesday off. In so doing, however, I also ended up with only one day off, but I knew I would be pushing myself too hard to work another day without getting some rest. Rest? I don't think it could really be called rest, but it was a break from working on site, I did get more sleep, and I did get a chance to take it a little easier. But, with so much on my to-do list, I didn't get to relax and do the things I wanted. In fact, I spent a great deal of my day trying to remove a tool bar I found that I don't know how I got it. I suspect it came through another site, and just kind of installed itself. I uninstalled it, but it came back a couple of days later. So, I went through and did a full uninstall, removing any traces I could find after the program was gone. The next day, when I opened up Chrome, there it was. Now, the tool bar never did show up, but it continued to change my opening page to a search page, called Connect. The tool bar and program responsible, however was called Conduit. I found this all out by researching it online. I also downloaded an anti-spyware program and it did clean out the program. But, it still showed signs after a reboot. I downloaded another anti-spyware and it also removed more of the program, and I thought I had it gone. I could not find any traces, but then my web browser started to run slower and slower. I opened Internet Explorer, and guess what? Yep it was back. I did find a solution online, but had to go through and do a full search in my registry and remove any related items. That helped, but I still had signs of it showing up, so I looked into more information and seen that Connect and Conduit were one and the same, and then while cleaning my registry, found items from Zynga that contained parts of the program. So, once again I removed the item from my browsers, then I removed my browsers, just to be safe. Next, I removed any items I could find on my drive, then cleaned the registry of any items from Conduit and Zynga. Now, it seems to be gone, my newly downloaded web browsers are clean and my system is running much faster. Oh, did I tell you I also have a Netbook with Chrome on it? No? Well I do, and of course they are in sync with each other. So, after I got my laptop cleaned, I went in to my Netbook to get the downloads and put them in my cloud storage so I could put a web browser back on here. When I opened Chrome in my Netbook, there was the damn Connect page. I have not had the Netbook for very long, and did not have much to lose by refreshing it back to the original setup. It removed anything I did not save, then reloaded the system with factory settings. That cleaned up the mess faster than if I had gone through the registry again, and with it being Windows 8, I wasn't sure just how to get around inside the workings. But, after spending most of the day on this task, it's nice to not see it show up again and to have things working back to normal. Hey, look at the counter I'm over a thousand words already. Yes, the site here counts the words, auto-saves, and gives a nice breakdown of typing speed, time spent writing, and a nice breakdown of what was written. Seriously, you should check it out; who knows, you may just enjoy writing in here. |
| I'm really in a kind of funk today -- just fed up with all the bullshit and time I spend giving and not getting any returns. It's like I'm swimming against the current and just never gain at all. I know, everyone has similar problems, and maybe that's so. I just don't see it. They may have similar, but at least there is a trade off someplace, I don't even see that. I put in an honest days work, do my best to make things work out, try and plan things out, and instead of getting ahead, it seems I get further behind. *** time-break *** I had a lot more written out, and saved. Then, the phone rang and I talked to my brother for a bit. Now, I'm back to finish this entry, but after reading through it, I decided to delete most of it. I put in a break after the first part I had written, or at least what's left of it. I deleted everything from the break on, and am redoing it. Why? Too negative. I'm an optimist by nature, but for a while now I've had a pretty gloomy and pessimistic outlook on life. It's hard not to; for a long time life's been giving me a lot of lemons. Now, however, I don't even get lemons. I take two steps forward, get knocked three back. I turn to those who I've given the most to over the years, and get a big sorry, can't help you. Even my darling wife has joined the club of those who hand over their problems but offer no help back. Oh sure, she puts in the effort to help, but in the end, it's only superficial, and I still have to do the doing part. With work, it's my job and I don't expect much from anyone. I have delegated some of the tasks, but she still works more like a mediator instead of just doing the task, or she offers a solution that isn't pliable. I do appreciate her trying, but she just isn't actually lessening the load much at all, and as the boss, it always falls back on me. That's fine, except it takes up a great deal of my life, I work thirty hours a week on the site and then put in another ten to twenty hours off. I don't have the option of leaving work at work, I have to bring mine home with me. Now, if they paid me a huge salary for this, I would be more positive, but I get .75 an hour during my scheduled hours. That's it, that's to cover everything I do off the clock after or before work. Since we cannot have phones or computers at work, I can't do anything on the clock and so it comes home with me. That means I don't actually get any time off, I have to answer my phone and make sure shifts are covered, paperwork is done, faxes are sent, and everyone under me gets their time off, shifts covered when sick or they can't make it in due to weather. I also have to coordinate between the company and the business we work at, interview, hire and train people, fill out reports, requests, and time corrections. It's another twenty hours a week or more to do it right. So, I have no time for anything else. I get home and go back to work, or I go to an interview, or I go fill out hire paperwork. If I'm not working, I have so many tasks that need my attention, I could work full time just trying to keep everything going at home. Then I also have a new dog I need to work with who puts a lot of demand on my time because she gets neglected too often as a result of me being at work, or out doing interviews and paperwork. My brother wants to spend some time together working on projects in the garage or fishing, my wife wants to spend time with me doing things we enjoy, and I try and cover it all. Only, there isn't that much of me and I don't have any time left over for the things I set aside for the rest. I love to read, and managed to get a bood read at work, because it's slow. But, since we can't have any electronics, I have to read the book.... *** time-break *** That was our daughter who stopped by, yet another break. She's my stepdaughter, and Rhonda was working on some pictures or something but didn't tell me what all was going on. Sarah stopped to get it, but I have no idea what it is. Oh well, she was suppose to stop this morning while Rhonda was at home. I don't remember where I was at, but it doesn't matter, I'm out of time for now and will have to just leave this like so many other things in my life right now, unfinished and doubtful I will ever get back to them. There just isn't any time, and when I do get a chance to go back for something, which is very rare, there are five new things pressing for the time anyway. If I was single, no family and didn't have a dog, I could maybe find time for most of it, and still have time to write. But, I am not single, and I do have a dog, and I do have family, along with my job that seems to demand 70% of my time. That leaves 30% left for the rest, say 15% for my wife, 10% for family, and 5% for the dogs. It's close to the balance right now, and as you see, there is no % for me, and since I do have to sleep sometime, I'm constantly at a deficit with the rest. So much negativity from an optimist -- can you see the problem? I look at the glass half full, but then someone comes along and drinks it! |
| It's getting late on me, so not much time to write. Today I have a good excuse for not getting in here sooner; I wasn't home. It was suppose to be my day off; Monday and Tuesday are my off days for the week. Yesterday, a blizzard moved into the area and that changed everything. It wasn't a bad storm, luckily we only got an inch or two of snow. But the wind continued to pick up speed throughout the day, and by mid afternoon, it was impairing visibility drastically. I was done work by two in the afternoon, just ahead of the storm. We had already received some snow, and it was windy, but not severe -- yet. Rhonda dropped me off in the morning, and since it was still pretty nice out, came back home. By one she was at work, the weather was getting much worse. She had an hour to burn up, so she went for some lunch, and an hour later, it was bad, just all around bad. it was snowing and the wind had picked up a lot. Visibility was down and it was getting colder. I didn't want to drive twenty five miles home in this, just to turn around in a couple hours and drive back in to pick her up, so I stayed in town all afternoon. She got done around eight thirty and we drove the twenty five miles home. It took over an hour, and a couple of times it was so bad we had to stop dead on the road until the wind let up enough to see the road again. At times we could only see about five feet, during the good spells, we had maybe twenty feet, and at the worst, we could not see the end of the hood. It was now gusting to sixty miles an hour, and the temperature had dropped to ten below zero. We did make it home, through limited visibility and some massive snow drifts. I knew that the opeing guard would not be able to drive in this morning, so I called him last night to let him know I would work for him. Knowing the roads were not plowed, I also told Rhonda to stay home. So, I worked the opening shift, then worked the afternoon shift. All on three hours of sleep. Once I was home, I changed into some comfortable cloths, enjoyed supper, and then came in here to get this done. Next, I shall enjoy a nice brandy, the beverage not the person, and then it's time for this writer to turn in and dream. |
| It's just a little after five in the afternoon here in South Dakota, and I'm in here getting this written. What's up with that? It's a blizzard, that's what's up. I worked this morning, and now I'm waiting for Rhonda to get done with her shift. The snow stopped, but the wind is shrieking at gusts of sixty miles an hour and the the temperature has dipped below zero. Right now, it's two degrees below zero and the wind is blowing snow to the point of near zero visibility and a wind chill of minus twenty two degrees. The interstate is closed from Brookings to the Canadian border and no travel advised. Yet here I sit waiting, which is better than driving home in this only to have to come back in for Rhonda and then drive home again. It's been busy at work, too. That's what makes it so miserable, people are still out shopping and I even seen on fool in shorts. I know there are some who do have good reason to be out, but most of these people are just out for something to do. Me, I'd like to not be out. If I had a choice, I'd just stay home when the weather is nasty, writing, reading, and playing some games would be fine with me. Funny, I have no choice I have to be out in this ad prefer to be home enjoying a cozy day with Rhonda and the two dogs. Meanwhile, here's a whole slew of folks who can stay home and prefer to go out in this nasty weather. It must be terrible to not be able to stay home without getting bored. These must be the same kids who whined daily, "I'm bored." Never ind they had every toy imaginable, cable television, every game, and anything else they desired. They just never had the ability to enjoy life, needing always to have something stimulate them. Me, I didn't have much, but I had an imagination and with it I could entertain myself for hours with very little. I still can. No, my problem isn't needing something to do, it's having too much to do and wanting more time to spend with my imagination again. |
| It's coming to the end of another long day and I'm beat. I didn't get much of anything done except for work, and a nice nap. The weather is turning nasty again, and I didn't know if I had the night off or if I would be getting a call to go back in, and was kind of stressed over it. Tomorrow, around six in the morning, we go into another blizzard warning, and it lasts through midnight. I work at eight, get done around two in the afternoon, and then Rhonda goes on shift. She closes and I usually pick her up around eight thirty. There will not be any running home tomorrow if the storm hits, just hang out in town all day. So, I won't be getting anything done around home, and may just bring my computer along in and try and get some things done in WdC. But, that means I have to move some items from this computer to the netbook so I can access them. I think I will just upload the file to the clouds tonight, then I can get at everything from any computer. So, I'm off to get a transfer started... |
| It not only got late on me tonight, it went right on past late. I've been debugging my computer, and it's very time consuming. Yes, I have a good antivirus program, and it seems to be catching most things. But, my computer still was slow, and my internet kept messing up. I looked online for some ideas to speed it back up, and discovered that my antivirus does not protect me from adware, or at least, not all of it. So, I downloaded a couple of free programs to try out and see which I want to keep and upgrade. They both worked good, and I did find quite a bit of adware on my system. One particular item was a nasty bug, and even though it was mostly removed, I still had some issues when the computer would first start up. Mostly, the conduit bug I had could not find it's module. So, I researched further, and discovered that I would have to clean some of this out myself, or risk it reinstalling itself again. I found a page that stepped me through a cleaning of my registry, and hopefully I have it all gone now. And, hopefully I didn't mess up anything I shouldn't have while I was in there. I guess we will find out on the next start up. |
| Another bitter cold day and I'm beat. It wasn't as windy today, but the temperature dropped way below zero, and combined with the wind we did have, it was dangerous low wind chill advisory. At least today I didn't have to work a double shift in it, which helped a lot. Even so, I'm still beat from yesterday. I don't know what it is about the extreme cold, but it sure does take a lot out of a person. Of course, only getting about two hours sleep the night before last, then working eleven hours straight through with only a couple of short breaks for the bathroom didn't help me any. I did get a bit more sleep last night, I suppose it was ten o'clock at the latest when I dropped off to sleep, probably even earlier. I slept sound, not waking for anything until the alarm went off this morning. Rhonda hit the snooze and we snuggled up and dozed for eight minutes, but I could not actually sleep, I was ready to get up. A cup of coffee and a half hour to wake up, then get dressed and out into the very cold morning. It was busier at work today, too. I'm glad I didn't have to stay any longer than I did today, and would have liked to have just had the day off, but that isn't possible with the number of workers we have right now. I could have taken a nap, too, but decided not to, so I would sleep good tonight and maybe, just maybe, get back on some sleep. I still have three days of work before another day off, so it would be a good thing to catch up on my sleep and recover from yesterday a bit. So, with that, I'm off to get ready for bed. |
| It's late and I'm not going to get much written in here. Not that I had much choice today, I spent the entire day working. I went in at four this morning and ended up not getting home until a little after five tonight. I worked a double shift because the other guard seems to have a problem getting in to work if the weather is bad. Of course, we talked about this, so today he called in sick. Not that it makes any difference, it's just frustrating, that's all. I know where he lives, and he does have quite a drive to get to work, and the roads are not the best. Also, they are secondary roads and are not plowed often. There are lots of areas for drifting and problems, too. Even so, working all day is tough enough anytime, but when it's a day like today, it's even more exhausting. The wind was blowing hard, up to fifty mph, and it was cold, only twelve degrees this morning at four. It dropped all day and is now down to negative nine degrees and will bottom out around negative twenty tonight. I work again in the morning, and will have to deal with the frigid cold and wind chills all morning. Of course, the same person comes in and relieves me tomorrow, so it may be all day again. Since I'm already beat, and may have another long day, this will have to suffice. |
| Not too late, but still.... It's later than I intended, and my day is running out faster than my tasks I wanted to get done. This was my second and last day off this week, and I had hopes of getting a lot done over the two days. Instead, I find myself somewhat frustrated in how little I did get done. Now, a couple hours later and I'm back to finish this entry. It's been a frustrating two days in the sense that I had hopes of getting a lot done and only managed to get a few things done. I feel good about the tasks I did get to, and I'm happy to have that part done. It just seems like it took so long to get so little done. Why? Problems, lots of problems. For one thing, my internet connection is too slow, and actually disconnects from time to time. I live in a small town, and the only service available is through the phone company. They do offer high speed, and we switched over from dial-up years ago. And, it was a good service, fast and dependable. They have upgraded and now offer three different high speed choices. Even as they upgraded, they told us we would have increased speeds without moving to the next level. In actuality our speed has dropped. I run speed tests from time to time to see if it's the computer or the internet. It's dropped from earlier tests run through the same server. Our provider actually has a link to a site that will run upload and download speed tests, and they match other sites I've compared them to. So, as more options become available, our service slows without us changing anything. Why? Well, so we will upgrade to the next level of service, which of course, costs more. We had decent speed and no problems for years, at thirty five bucks a month for internet. Then, they upgraded and the price went up to forty bucks a month. Now, we have two higher speeds available, and the price is nearing fifty bucks, is slower, and disconnects. I could upgrade, for another fifteen bucks, making it sixty five or eighty bucks for the fastest service. I'm sure it would be faster, probably back to where this was at before. I'm sure it will be more dependable, too; like it was before the upgrades. So, I either pay more to get the same as I had, or suffer through with slow connections and interruptions. I wish there were more choices for us, but for the time being, we are kind of stuck with this. That's why, over the last two days, I spent as much time waiting as I did working. And, I still didn't get much done. There were other problems, too. It seems like time goes by way too fast and everybody wants to make a person wait. That's the whole of it, lots of time wasted waiting for someone else, for websites, and for people to call back. Hopefully I find a solution to save some of the time I waste waiting around. I could understand if it was wasted by me, pissing it away playing games or doing unproductive things, but this past two days I've been very careful not to waste any time just to see if it was me, or if I was unable to control how long it takes to do things. The answer was, I have no control over it. Sure, I do squander some of my time, but now I know, I waste a little, the rest is wasted without choice. |
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