The Deliverance of Peter

The Deliverance of Peter

The small white car carrying two passengers had been driving for some time. The driver appeared to be uncertain of the direction of their destination. The women seemed to be getting aggravated with him.
“Peter, do you know where we are at?”
“Of course I do Sarah.”
“I think you’re lost.”
“Not lost, just looking for the right direction.”
“No Peter, you’re lost. I want you to get directions. Stop at the next gas station.”
“Ok, I‘ll stop somewhere, wait till I find someone. It might take a while.”
Peter, a very religious man, used the bible as a guideline for everything he did. He would consult the bible or a member of the clergy for answers. Sarah on the other hand, believed only in religious philosophy of establishing a moral code, rather than the beliefs and rituals associated with formal religion. Sarah believed that religion was more for moral lessons, rather than true teaching, like what Peter believed. Despite these differences, they had just wed and were on there honeymoon.
Sarah was tired of driving aimlessly, and had decided to look for a map. She checked the glove compartment, only to find a bible. Then Sarah looked under the seats and in the back, still she found only more bibles.
“Peter, why do you have three bibles in the car, but no map?”
“The bible can guide you better than any map could.”
Sarah replied, seeming rather irritated with Peter, “You go every where with that bible. Can’t you just think for yourself, instead of consulting that book.”
“Sarah, we have discussed this before. You know how I feel about religion and I know how you feel. So why don’t we just try not to argue about it, ok?”
“I just don’t understand why you have to have three bibles, but you can’t possibly own one map. You rely on that book too much. Every time you do anything, you pull out that book and read a passage or two. Can’t you just do what you think is right, not what some book tells you is right?”
“Well, the bible is always right. Why shouldn’t I consult it if it is always right?”
“So what your saying is that whatever is right or good comes from the bible’s teachings.”

“Well, yes. The bible is a great teacher of morals and lessons. You have even said that yourself.”

“Yes, I did say that, but you think that all the good lessons are taught in the bible through God. Also you believe that God is the one who created all good of the universe and Satan created all the evils of the universe. Am I correct in saying that?”

“Yes, you are right. So what, everyone knows that the Almighty God created everything good in the universe,” replied Peter, as he was somewhat laughing.
Sarah didn’t like his comical response. Therefore, in a rather attacking tone, she answered. “So lets think about this for a minute. Good and evil are relative terms. One cannot exist without the other. Therefore, when God created good, he must have created evil as well, because he could not have created good alone. So if this God, or creator of evil...”
Peter, now taking offense to her comments. “That’s a false accusation and you know it. God isn’t the creator of evil. I can find a million passages that tells how he...”
“Peter let me finish. I’ll use less offensive terms, ok?”
“Fine, if you must.”
“So as I was saying, if God was the one to bring good into the world, then he must have also brought evil into the world, for one depends upon the other. So when this God created the world, he had to create good and evil at the same time. Therefore, how can everything in the bible teach only good, when good can only exist with evil?”
“The bible does teach both good and evil, depending upon how it is interpreted.”
“Well, if your saying that, then how can you consult your bible for everything that happens. What if you interpret the bible wrong? What if what you interpret to be good is really evil? Good and evil are only perspective terms. Maybe what you think is good, another thinks is evil. So how can the bible always be right if its very text contradicts itself? Why can’t you just do what you think is right without consulting the bible? Can’t you just try it.”
“Listen Sarah, can we just stop arguing about this for a little bit. I just saw a sign for a gas station, up ahead.”


About 5 minutes later they stumbled upon Pinnacle’s Peak, a perfect place to stop. Peter pulled in and stepped out of the white, ten year old vehicle. He was wearing sandals and had a dark thick beard and long black hair.
“I’ll ask for directions here.”
“I don’t know if you will get any directions here.”
“I will try anyways. I’ll be right back.”

Peter entered the store, as a man in a great hurry, nearly knocked Peter down.
“Hey why don’t you watch where you’re going,” said the man.
“Sorry,” replied Peter.
He then went to the large rack of maps and selected the biggest one he could find.
“I guess I can’t be lost with this one,” he mumbled to himself.
As Peter was paying for the maps, he asked, “Could you tell me how to ...”
Before Peter could finish his words, he heard three loud revolver shots in the distance. Peter ran outside to see what had happened. He noticed that his old white car was missing. However, it was not the car that he was concerned about. Peter yelling at the top of his lungs, “Sarah, Sarah, where are you!”
A barely audible sound was heard, “Peter.” Peter ran to her. He knelt beside her, holding her bloody body. His eyes were now overflowing with tears. He said hysterically, “Sarah, don’t do this to me. I can’t live without you.”
She could only talk in a whisper,
“Peter ... I ... I love you.” Peter yelling,
“No! Don’t do this to me. I love you too. Don’t ...”
She tried to talk again,
“Peter ...”
That was the last word she ever spoke. Sarah lay motionless in Peter’s arms. He was reluctant to leave her, he couldn’t let go of her.


Peter had sat at home, alone for a week. He did not communicate with anyone. When he went to the funeral, he sat silently and all alone, away from his family and friends. Everyone tried to talk to him, but he wouldn’t. He refused to talk to anyone. After the funeral, he avoided everyone and began to drive home in his black rented car. He wanted to be alone. On the drive home, Peter began thinking more and more, wondering why God let this happen. He began to do what he had thought he would never do, he began to question his faith.
“Goddamnitt,” he said aloud.
He used the lord’s name in vain.
“Who cares.”
At this point, Peter only thought about his wife and what happened to her. He didn’t care about God and his rules. He just wanted God to answer a few questions. Why did God let this horrible event happen? He is almighty and powerful, why didn’t he stop this? What reason could God have for killing Sarah? What kind of plan is that for a person? Sarah is dead and the murderer is free. What kind of justice is that?
“Goddamnitt.”
Again using the lord’s name in vain. This didn’t seem to bother him, he was only concerned with his wife.
“I could have done something. I could’ve ... I could’ve ... I don’t know.”
Peter felt so powerless. He didn’t know what to do. The bible didn’t have a passage for these questions.
“Goddamnitt.”
Peter pulled the car over, and his eyes filled with tears.
Peter said aloud, as he was crying,
“Sarah! Why? Why did this have to happen!”
He sat in his car, just crying for a long time. Finally, he tried to compose himself. He sat up and saw his reflection in the mirror. Peter barely recognized his face. His long black hair was now all twisted and appeared dirty. Peter saw that he had not trimmed his beard and also that his eyes were red from crying.
“Ok, I can do this. I can make it.”

Peter began to drive again, trying to answer questions. Peter then began to wonder why he believes in God. He remembered back as far as he could for the answer. Every single Sunday of his life, including the one in which Sarah died, he had gone to church.

One time, about 10 years ago, he remembers asking his parents as to why they always went to church.
“Why do we have to go to church today. I don’t want to. It’s boring,” said Pete.
“Out of all the hours in the week you can’t give one hour to God. The one who created you and everything you own,” his mother said to him.
“Yeah, but does it really matter if we go every Sunday. I don’t see the difference if we miss one here and there.”
“You need to go to church every Sunday to repent for the sins you have committed over the past week. You’re not perfect are you? If you are, then you can miss church sometimes,” his mother snapped back at him.
“No, ma, I’m not perfect, but I just don’t see why we have to always be worried about pleasing God. Isn’t he satisfied if we try to be better people. Why do we have to follow his rules all the time? Why are his rules right all the time? My friend believes in a different God. He is one that...”
Before he could finish his mother interrupted him. She was now yelling,
“Peter! I have had enough of your blasphemous talk. You definitely need to go to church every week. You’re lucky I don’t make you go more often with talk like that. Now get dressed and get ready for church!”
“Yes ma, I’ll get dressed.”

Peter thought about those questions he had previously asked. He remembered asking others those same questions and getting similar answers. If the bible says, God has a predestined future for everyone, how is one able to perform the will of God? If one’s path is already determined, how can they change what is suppose to happen? If God does this, then isn’t he being unjust and biased towards certain individuals? If he is all-powerful, why can’t he make everyone equally good and happy? Why would he choose to make some people better than others? Why would God make some people enjoy a heavenly existence, while others suffer a miserably eternity. Wouldn’t everyone benefit from an enjoyable heavenly existence? If God is the one who made all these inequalities, what kind of person is he? If he had the power to create any type of world he wanted and he created one in which certain people suffer yet other prosper, what kind of a God is he? If anyone had the choice, wouldn’t they pick a happy existence?

Peter continued to drive without any real direction. He wondered why Christianity became so popular. He remembered his days in Catholic High School and Catholic College. Christianity had became a major religion, in 395 when it was declared the official religion of the Roman Empire. At that time, Rome influenced nearly every person in the known world. They completely controlled Europe and parts of Asia, Africa and the Middle East. Even after the Roman Empire collapsed, Christianity spread throughout Europe and the rest of the Western Civilizations. When European explorers discovered new land, they imposed their religion upon others, so because people were forced to believe it, they did.
Peter felt the same way, he was forced to go to church and believe in God. Because he had been programmed to think and act and believe a certain way, he did this. It was the only thing he had ever known, therefore it was what he relied on to get him through life. However, when his religion failed, he had nothing. If he lost religion, he lost what he has always thought and believed in. Peter thought about this a great deal recently. He does not believe that God was being fair with him. He wished that somebody could give him answers to these questions. Thinking about this, he just got more and more depressed over the loss of his wife. Everything he has thought about recently came back to Sarah’s death. Again Peter pulled his car over and his eyes began to fill with water. Peter said aloud,
“No, I am not going to cry. I can make it.”
However, as he said this, tears were running down his eyes. He sat crying loudly for a considerable amount of time.
Finally, he sat up and wiped his tears away. Then he looked where he had pulled in. He read the sign aloud,
“ Jude’s Gun and Pawn Shop.” He stepped out of his rented car wearing dirty sandals and clothing. As Peter entered the shop, he was walking with his head down.
“Hello, what can I get for you?” asked the man behind the counter.
“What’s the cheapest gun you have?”
“Well to tell you the truth, I just got a fine revolver in today. The man said it was only fired three times. I tell you what, seems to me that you’re havin’ a bad day. How about I give you this revolver and a box of bullets, half off. Now that ought to cheer you up.”
“I’ll take the gun, but I only need one bullet.”
“Well that’s your choice. I am just trying to help you out. Can’t tell you what to do, but I don‘t want you doin’ nothin’ stupid with that gun, you here? I wouldn’t want anything bad to happen to any of my customers.”

Peter left the shop with a revolver and a bullet. He hurried into his black rented car and sped home. When he got home, he went straight to his bedroom. Sitting on his bed, he took out the revolver. He looked up at the ceiling pointing the gun to his temple. Quietly, he closed his eyes and said “I’m coming to see you Sarah.” Then suddenly he heard.
“No you are not Pete.”
Peter shocked says,
“What .. Sarah is that you?”
“Yes Pete it is.”
She says in a troubled tone,
“What are you doing?”
Peter didn‘t answer the question instead saying,
“I want to see you and hold you and touch you so badly. I figured this is the only way to get you.”
“Pete, I do not understand what you are trying to do and neither do you. What have you been thinking about for a week.”
“I’ve been thinking of you.”
Sarah was getting annoyed with his responses. She replied in an upset tone,
“No, no you haven’t. You have done every single thing in the past week for self pity. You want people to feel sorry for your loss. You try to alienate yourself from everyone who is trying to help you. What is wrong with you? I married a better person than this. You think nobody else has lost somebody they love? They have, and you know what they learned to cope with it. The problem is that you have always relied on what somebody else told you to do. You never thought for yourself. The only reason you did anything was to please someone else. Don’t you realize it yet. Don’t you understand what your doing here?”
“What do you mean?”
“Remember that story you told me about your mom yelling at you when you questioned your beliefs.”
“Yes”
“What did you learn from that?”
“Don’t ever question authority.”
“See that's the problem with you. You are afraid of the truth. You take what someone says, regardless of its truthfulness, as the truth. You are afraid to find answers to difficult questions. And worst of all you are afraid of challenges and failing. You need to understand one thing, everyone sins and nobody is perfect.”
Peter interrupted Sarah,
“Jesus was perfect.”
Sarah quickly replied to his statement,
“How do you know who he was and what he did?”
“That’s what the bible is for.”
“Let me finish before you speak, ok?”
“Yes, Sarah.”
“As I way saying, Jesus was only perfect in the eyes of those who worshipped him. How do you think they are going to make him out to be. The truth is that everyone has to sin so they can learn from their mistakes. Every mistake is a great teacher in the long run. No one is born so perfect as not to commit any mistake. Every mistake opens our eyes to reality by bringing us results we do not desire. Don’t you see now why you can’t kill yourself?”
“No, I don’t understand. I would rather die today than live the rest of my life without you.”
“Pete, listen to me. You can’t kill yourself, you have so much more to live for than you thought. You haven’t even begun to have live your life, so how can you end it. My death certainly was a mistake on many peoples parts, but everyone it affected should become a better person because of it. The things learned from this mistake will teach many people great lessons. The events and the struggles which you went through are but experience which has molded your character and has shaped you in a different manner. Because of the knowledge you have acquired through this tragic event, you will not have to go through this event again. The wisdom gained from my loss will ensure that you never allow such events to occur. Pete, I have to leave you now. I can’t make the decision for you, but I hope that you will make the right one. I bid you farewell my love.”
Peter then yelled aloud,
“No! Don’t go.”

At that instant, Pete opened his eyes, lowered the gun from his head, and looked around the room. He sat staring at something for a minute. It was the map he had bought. He picked up the map, hidden under his many bibles, and looked at it for another minute. He was standing in his room with a rather large map. Then Pete headed to the bathroom with the map and gun in hand. He opened the waste basket and noticed what was inside. He had to laugh at what he saw.
Chuckling aloud he said, “That had to be Sarah.”
Pete began to reach down for the object in the trash, but instead stopped and tossed the gun and map in as well. He then went and grabbed a few more objects from his room and removed his footwear, tossing them all in the trash. Pete did one more thing, he grabbed a razor and shaved off his beard. Then, something which he hadn’t done since his wedding day. He smiled.